#I think he also just didn't want to lose his baby brother privileges of getting away with things

[ceruleanterrapin]

Every time I'm reminded that Mikey is the actual eldest I want to punch someone

[hangup119]

FEELS LIKE A THRILLER! ᯓᡣ𐭩

18. all's well that ends well word count | 3k

YOU’VE BEEN FRIENDS WITH ANTON LEE SINCE YOU CAN EVEN REMEMBER. You met each other as kids, forced to hang out with each other at a house party his parent’s had invited your family to. Given that you two were around the same age in comparison to the other kids who were still oblivious babies or whiny toddlers, it was only natural for you and Anton to gravitate towards each other: wherever he went you would follow, your fondest memories with him being when you both constantly abused your ‘big sister’ and ‘big brother’ privileges to boss the other kids around. 

But in comparison to you who always got a little too mean towards the little kids, Anton was much more lenient; it was why they often favored him over you, which you didn’t really mind. That meant they’d bother you less during parties. But it was still you who hung out with Anton the most and it was you who stuck to his side even if the younger kids didn’t really want you around. Then middle school came, and you two gradually drifted apart until you had your own set of friend groups in high school—you were off with Minji and Sunoo and Taesan and Jaehyun and Danielle, and he was constantly surrounded by other guys you didn’t really care about (all except for a certain someone, of course, but that’s later on into the future). The house parties happened less and less, the little kids grew up and eventually left the two of you alone, and it was only until he found out about your little crush on Seunghan did you and Anton finally start bringing back the friendship that was slowly becoming forgotten. 

Anton is… a good kid, which is why everyone is always drawn to him. He’s always had a heart as big as his head, so perhaps the reason why you’re this nervous about meeting with him after what seemed like days since your fight is because you don’t want to lose him again. Drifting apart is natural, friends fight—you know all that, but at the very least you did not want to end it on bad terms. You don’t want your last memories of your childhood best friend being bitter, which is why you must absolutely not mess this one chance up. 

“…Did you ever, like, have a crush on him?” Seunghan inquires slowly, tapping his pen against his chin languidly as he sits on the floor beside your bed. 

You give him a small, questioning glare. “Why do you ask?” you start, suspicious. “Because you think girls and boys simply can’t be friends?” 

Seunghan shrugs. “Yeah?” 

“Wait, really? You really think that?” your shoulders slumped.

“I mean,” Seunghan says, leaning back on your bed. “Anton’s pretty handsome, surely you’ve had a crush on him when you were younger, right?” 

You consider it. “Hmm… well, I guess I did.” 

“Really?” Seunghan seems more shocked rather than appalled. You hoped that was a good thing.

“In seventh grade, I think,” you clarify, “that was when he started getting…cute, I guess, and he was also getting more involved in swimming. Everyone started finding him attractive too, so it wasn’t just me. It was like being attracted to him was the new trend, or something.” 

“What happened after that?” 

“Well, he got a girlfriend around that time, so I quickly lost all the interest I had in him. I think I was super in-denial about it, too, so it’s not like anything would have happened between us because I didn’t want it happening at all,” you blandly respond. “Anyway, whenever I think about dating Anton, I just keep remembering about how he’d always cling and cry to his mom for hours when something didn't go his way back when we were little. So, major turn-off.” 

Seunghan laughs loudly, and you watch him fondly as he tries to regain his senses. “Seriously?” he asks, tilting his head to the side. 

“Seriously.” 

Seunghan looks at you thoughtfully. “So you lost interest in him because he got a girlfriend, but why wasn’t it the same when it came to me?” 

You pause, blinking slowly at him as shock invades your expression. Seunghan merely stares right back at you, an easygoing smile on his face while he waits for your response. 

“I…” your words lose you, and you desperately try to grab at them. But Seunghan is patient, he waits for you to gather them, leaning his cheek against the cap of his knee while he sits beside you on the floor of your room. “I don’t… know?” 

His smile widens. “You don’t know?” 

You feel your face flush. “Well, I mean,” you start off bashfully, looking away from his prying gaze. “This and that are different… I knew Anton way before I started crushing on him, but I barely knew you. Plus, I realized I just saw him as a brother, but you… we weren’t even friends in the first place…” 

Your face is probably as hot as a whistling kettle after you finished talking, and Seunghan’s amused smile isn’t helping your situation in the slightest. 

“Don’t start teasing me,” you grumble, and Seunghan just laughs again, moving closer to pinch your cheek. 

“But you’re so cute,” Seunghan coos, inching closer while you attempt to push his invasive hands away from your face. “You’re my cute girl, the cutest ever, I just wanna—” 

A loud knock interrupts him, and you jump at the sound. 

“Anton,” you gasp, staring back at Seunghan with wide eyes. 

His silence enables you to aggressively push him away from you, and he gently stumbles back into the opposite way as you scramble to get onto your feet. He gives you an offended look, and you look back at him with an apologetic expression only to be met with a playful roll of his eyes. You hype yourself up as you make your way to the door, before opening it without further ado. 

Anton blinks down at you. “Oh, hey,” he casually says. 

“Hey!” you respond, suspiciously a little out of breath. 

Anton glances at Seunghan who’s keeping himself busy with his laptop by the back, looks at your flushed face, before making a disgusted expression. “Ew, don’t tell me you two were making out just now…” 

Seunghan freezes, the tips of his ears turning red while your jaw almost hits the floor. 

You instinctively hit Anton’s arm. “No, we weren’t, idiot!” 

He yelps, nursing his arm. “Ow! You didn’t have to hit me, jeez… I came here in peace, and this is how you treat me?” 

You cringe. “Sorry…”

Anton quickly digresses. He meets your hesitant gaze, quietly asking, “Can we talk outside?” 

“Oh, uh, sure,” you blinked. There it was—the Anton you knew when you were kids, always so shy despite being in the company of his friends. But the situation is a little more than just that, so you understand where he was coming from. “In the hallway?” 

“Yeah, it won’t be quick,” Anton confirms as you step out of the room, taking one last longing look at Seunghan, who merely sends you back a reassuring smile as if he was saying ‘goodluck!’ to the both of you. (You refrained from eating your fist at how cute he looked.)

Out in the hall, the air turns into suffocating awkwardness you never thought you’d have with Anton Lee. You don’t remember being this… tense around his presence, as if you’re walking around eggshells around him no matter how nonchalant the two of you tried to act. You try to recall the last time you felt this awkward around him, but you can only come up with the brief moment in middle school when you harbored a crush on him that hadn’t even lasted a week. You had felt awkward around him because viewing Anton in a romantic light never really seemed that appealing, but that feeling had immediately washed away when you realized all you ever wanted out of him was his friendship and nothing else. 

Of course, you can’t say the same about Anton. It’s not as if you can read his mind despite knowing him for so long now, but now you wonder if he’s experienced the same feelings you once did. And, in some part of you, you wonder if he harbors any romantic feelings for you right now—even if the rest of your friends tried to hide it, you weren’t oblivious to Jaehyun’s knowing glances whenever you and Anton were in the same room. 

You just didn’t want to acknowledge such things ever again, not when your friendship with him has been sailing pretty well these past few years already. 

Well, until now, that is.

“So…” you trail off, looking at his shoulder instead of his face. 

“I’m sorry,” Anton immediately says, voice quieter than ever. 

Oh. 

“I shouldn’t have acted so weird after promising I’d set you up with Seunghan,” he continues, scratching his nape. “I never meant to insinuate that your feelings for him were shallow. I know how much you like him, but I ended up projecting my doubts into you and ruining our friendship in the process anyway. I honestly really, really wanted you guys to get together because I know that’s what makes you happy, and it’s also what makes Seunghan happy, so—” 

“I forgive you, Anton,” you interrupt, before looking down at the floor. “And I’m also sorry; I shouldn’t have cornered you like that in the groupchat. I just… I just hated the thought of you disapproving of my relationship with him, even though you were only worried about us. And I don’t blame you for being suspicious of me, too, because I was honestly starting to falter during the first stages of becoming close with Seunghan, but I ended up really liking him anyway. And I’m glad you helped us get closer, really; I just wish we went about our concerns differently and honestly.”

“Yeah,” Anton agrees, smiling lightly, “but it’s okay now. You got your man, and I did my job. We’re all good. Right?” 

“Yeah,” you repeat. “Life is good.”

“Eh, well, not… really? I have a composition assignment due in forty-eight hours and I haven’t gotten a single note in,” Anton says dryly. “I need to lock in right now.” 

You push him, and he looks back at you in offense. You smiled, saying, “Lock in with us, then. We were just doing homework, for your information.” 

Anton grumbles. “Yeah, right… I’d still third-wheel anyway.” 

“Don’t be a big baby, ‘ton,” you roll your eyes. “We’re not gonna kiss in front of you.” 

“Please don’t put that image in my mind. I’ll vomit right in this hall.” 

“And I’ll make you clean it up, then I’m gonna tell your mommy how good of a job you did.” 

“Kay why ess.” 

You pause, looking at him thoughtfully. Anton slowly looks back at you, and you send him a small smile. 

“...Thanks for looking out for us,” you say, quietly, “you’re a—...you’re a good best friend.”

“Naturally,” Anton snorts, and you give him a blank look. He quickly feigns a cough, saying, “You’re my best friend, too. Of course I’ll look out for you.” 

It feels like a weight has been lifted off of your shoulders. 

“...Can you believe that I had a crush on you during seventh grade?” you joke, intending to lighten the mood. 

“Yeah?” Anton raises a brow at you, surprisingly unfazed. 

You blink. 

“Wait, seriously?” 

“Yeah, I knew you liked me at that time,” Anton casually replies. “But then you started liking Intak from choir. By the way, he also knew you liked him—he told me at our last concert.” 

“What?! How?!” 

“...You’re not that slick, you do know that, right? The only reason Seunghan never knew was because you barely talked to him.” Anton explained dryly, sending you a disapproving look. “You were too—admirer-like. It gets sad to look at sometimes. Those four years could’ve been shortened to, like—I don’t know, three months? If you just freakin’ talked to him or something.”

Your eyes narrow. Anton raises his arms up in defense. 

“But all’s well that ends well, right?” he quickly says, voice laced with a tinge of panic. “Let’s not drag this scene out now…” 

You sigh in response, but oblige nonetheless. “You’re right. All’s well that ends well.” 

You smile at Anton again, feeling content. You hope he shares the sentiment. 

Just in time, Seunghan pops his head out from your door, looking both ways before finding the two of you crowding to the right. The creaking sound the door made as it opened forces yours and Anton’s attention towards the interruption, only to find a sheepish Seunghan stare right back at you. 

“You guys have been out here for a while—just checking,” he says, ruffling his already messy black hair. “My bad.” 

Although he tries to play it off with an air of nonchalance, you think you sense a hint of worry in his tone regardless. The thought makes you both uneasy and excited at the same time, which shouldn't even make sense but it just does.

Because Seunghan’s your boyfriend. And sometimes boyfriends get jealous when their girlfriend’s are alone with another guy. God, you shouldn’t be liking that sentence as much as you actually do. 

“It’s all good, man,” Anton assures, waving a hand placatingly. Awkward again, but that’s none of your concern anymore—that’s just how Anton is anyway. He bites the inside of his cheek, flickering his gaze between the two of you. “Um, so… I think I’ll go now. See you guys later.”

“What?” Seunghan exclaims, a little too dejected. “So soon? You should stay and study with us. I know you still have that composition assignment to work on, and if you go back to your dorm now I know Sungchan’s just going to distract you.” 

Anton winces. “Erm… I think I’d rather have that than third whe—” 

You interrupt him. “He’s right! We’re better company than Sungchan anyway. Stay. Let’s get some food or something. And pull an all-nighter or whatever.” 

Seunghan nods excitedly. Anton looks at the both of you incredulously. 

“What the heck? You guys haven’t even been dating for a month, yet you’re already so in-sync of being annoying,” he says. “You’re quite literally making me pick between two evils right now.” 

“So you’re staying?” Seunghan asks, grinning widely. You share the same, hopeful expression. “The lesser evil is definitely us, right?”

“...I’m not so sure about that.”

“Pleaaaaase, Anton, we promise we’ll be good, supportive study-buddies!” Seunghan needlessly insists. And you should be a little irked that your boyfriend’s begging another man to hang out with you two, but you surprisingly aren’t. One more company didn’t hurt, after all. 

So Anton can’t even believe what he’s about to say next:

“Fine, but Y/N’s paying for food!” 

You and Seunghan immediately cheer. 

“Wait, what?” you ask dumbly. 

But you eventually relent as the other two start making their way down the hall, an echo of a nonsensical conversation picking up. At least it didn’t take that much of a resistance from Anton to agree to yours and Seunghan’s invitation, and sure, it would’ve been nicer to just hang out with your boyfriend, but you also didn’t mind having your best friend tagging along as well. He was, after all, most of the reason why the two of you got together in the first place, so you more or less owed it to him. Plus, a hang out will slowly dissolve that suffocating awkwardness that has been circling between the two of you these past few weeks despite having already made up just minutes ago anyway, so really—all’s well that ends well. 

When you finally catch up to them, Seunghan is the first one to speak up. 

“So, Anton, was there ever a time you liked Y/N?” 

The two of you practically choke on air. 

“Excuse me,” you say. 

Anton’s response is quieter. “You heard us…?” 

Seunghan laughs. “Sorry, I got curious…” he says although he doesn’t sound all that remorseful. “Did you, though?” 

“How can you just ask that?” Anton squeaks out. 

“No, wait, I’m curious too!” you exclaim. “I can’t just be the one who had feelings for you at some point—you know how embarrassing that is?!” 

Seunghan nods along. “Yeah! So embarrassing!” 

“You guys are crazy, you’re literally her boyfriend!” Anton cries out, before slowly turning away. “...And yes, I did like her back at some point.” 

You almost trip on nothing. “What?”

Anton awkwardly avoids your gaze. 

Seunghan hollers, and you send him a pointed look. He quiets down.

You look concerningly horrified when you ask Anton. “Wait… you’re for real? When? Why? How?”

“In seventh grade,” he replies meekly. “It just happened, I guess.” 

You and Seunghan almost go into shock. 

“Holy shit,” he whispers, staring at Anton with wide eyes. “You guys could’ve been—oh, my God. Wow.” 

“Wait, so if you knew I liked you, then why didn’t you…?” you trail off, confused. 

Anton rolls his eyes indignantly. “By the time I did have feelings for you, you were already over it. What was I supposed to do?”

“I don’t know—fight for her?” Seunghan suggests. “Such a wasted opportunity…”

“Dude,” Anton says dryly. “If I did that, you guys wouldn’t be dating right now!”

“Oh, right.” 

You snort. “I guess it just means we aren’t meant for each other, huh?” you joke.

Seunghan almost looks sad. “Well, when you put it like that… I guess it really was a ‘right person, wrong time’ kind of situation, huh?” 

“Yeah,” Anton says. “I like this outcome better, though. I like you guys together.” 

You look at him pitifully. “Anton, you don’t have to be sad…” 

“I’m not sad.” 

“We’ll find you a partner soon… for all the help you’ve given us… I mean, they probably won’t be as cool and awesome as me, but at least you won’t be lonely anymore…” 

“No thanks. Can we just go get food now?” 

“No, really, Seunghan and I are always here for you. You helped us, so now it’s our turn to help you—what do you think of Wonyoung? She’s pre-med.” 

“Oh! I know someone who’s friends with her, what do you think? I think you guys would be a good match.” 

“Go to hell, the two of you.”

prev | masterlist | next

SUMMARY. pining after hong seunghan has always felt like an unachievable reality; however, just a few months into your first year of college, it seems that the gods have finally listened to your prayers when news breaks out that your long-time crush is single once again.

AUTHOR'S NOTE. hi guys sorry for the longassshhh wait omg. i cant believe it took me this long to finish the reconciliation chapter but ykw... we're here now and that's all that matters. i will never leave u guys hanging ✊anyways this baby is ending in 1 chapter tehee see u next time.

TAGLIST. @shoberi @miyawwn @starwonb1n @yujinxue @revehosh @alwayswook @rksbae @emohoon @nujeskz @ilovejungwonandhaechan @meowbini @nakam00t @siuewnb @cake1box @dearmarklee @kyusqult @snowyseungs @ffixtionista @odxrilove @hisrkive @saeist @lilysflower1 @onlyhyunjin @eternallyhyucks @syzavxy @calumsfringe @yipyipmorals @user7520 @tojis-luver @ilymarkchan @fae-renjun @otblous @injunnie-lemon @jjk-97 @leeis @brachioswrld @i1uvc4ke @soheendo

[yuri-is-online]

... right so who wants to hear my deranged theory about Yuri Tokyo Debunker with no evidence backing it up I believe only as a joke.

The mutual mommy issues and classical music interest made me think that Yuri and Jin could be related. A lot of Yuri's... yuri-ness screams second child syndrome, I couldn't find where or if it was even said but Yuri seems to indicate he was raised to be a doctor. We know Jin's dad is the head of the entire institute, the institute also has a medical branch. Based on what we know about Jin's dad he seems like the old school political dynasty sort, if he had two sons raising one to take over the Institute and the other to oversee its medical branch makes a lot of sense. It would also make sense for Yuri, as the baby of the family, to maybe be closer to their mother than Jin was. If Jin was expected to take over for their father, it makes sense for his dad to monopolize his time and not allow him to spend as much of it with his mom. Yuri could have spent almost all of his time with her, and if Mama Kamurai was particularly sickly (or cursed) Yuri's interest in becoming a doctor becomes extremely significant. It is clear both Yuri and Jin love their mothers, whoever they are, but if she was the same woman their hatred for each other can be explained by a sibling rivalry. Jin resenting Yuri for being mommy's "favorite" and h Yuri hates that Jin is daddy's favorite and gets all the money to do whatever he wants with while he's stuck writing expense reports for his vital research. Jin could even be blaming Yuri for being unable to save their mom, it certainly seems like Yuri is blaming himself already.

If this was the case, I think whatever injury Jin has sustained probably was the breaking point between the two. Yuri probably doesn't want to lose his brother, he seems like the sort who would really desperately want big brother's approval. If Jin turned his help away in disgust then of course that would nuke the relationship between the two dorms. If Yuri really was just Jin's younger brother (oh how phrasing it like that would irritate him) then of course everyone else would see his behavior as a temper tantrum and not a concern. He's just mad daddy doesn't love him, give it a rest. Yuri will get over this soon enough, he's a grown adult... right?

This would also mean that Yuri didn't need to ever have been placed in Frostheim. He always could have been in Mortranken, he just associated with Frostheim because he is the younger brother of the King. And why he hates Darkwick General so much and is so insistent on doing his own thing: he wants to prove he is more than his family name. That he can cure people, that he isn't his father's puppet. This would probably further drive the wedge between him and Jin, that's something Jin wants to do himself but can't on account of being the oldest son. He sees his little brother as privileged in the same way his little brother thinks he is.

Counter Arguments/Rebuttals:

They do not look much alike. Zenji and Jiro + Hyde and Sho do, so the game making them look different is my biggest reason I think this could be wrong. They don't need to be related for their dislike for each other to make sense, it would just be deeply tragic. And could potentially set up an arc where Zenji chews Jin out for being a shitty older brother, he loves Jiro so much he would die (and probably did) defending him. Why is Jin ignoring his brother? Has he no heart? (not to mention why Yuri is so attached to Jiro, little brothers need to stick together)

Different last names. I think this could be explained by Yuri using his mother's maiden name to separate himself from his family, which would further irritate Jin because how fucking dare he use their mom's name like that?

Like I said, this doesn't need to be the explanation for why Yuri and Jin hate each other. He very easily could have just been a student there and failed to help Jin through his injury. It makes just as much if not more sense. My one real reason for holding onto brother theory when that one works is that... fuck that's a lot of students transferring out of Frostheim. Almost too many to make sense if you go with Haku having originally been there too. It almost feels like it makes more sense if Yuri has always been in Mortranken... but not by much when you take into account everything else you need to believe in order for brother theory to be true.

[fromperdition4]

Kinn the Star

There is so much to say about this scene in the woods - where Kinn and Porsche are finally on equal footing, and they both take turns encouraging the other to open up.

One line from Kinn here sticks with me the most -

He explains how he'd wanted to be a singer as a kid, entered a competition but quit. Not because he didn't do well, but because he thinks his father bribed the judges to let him win.

And my mind's just whirring with all the implications here:

First, there's what this shows of Kinn's character - he has all the makings of a nepo baby, and definitely uses his money and privileges to get things that he (or rather his father) wants (see: expensive diamond necklace that no one's ever going to wear). But, he also has pride and integrity - he can recognize when other people are more deserving than he is, and he doesn't want undue recognition. Not when it's something that would be personally meaningful to him otherwise.

Then I'm also struck by Korn's side of this (because I can't stop thinking about Korn's relationship with his sons) - was bribing the judges an act of fatherly care, one of those intrusive things that controlling parents do because they think it would be better for their kid (even when it's something their kid would hate)? Or did he see an opportunity to improve the family's reputation, and couldn't stand to see a Theerapanyakul lose? How did Korn take Kinn quitting, if that was the case?

Of course there's always the possibility that Korn didn't bribe the judges, and Kinn won on his own merit...

never mind

That Kinn's long-forgotten dream was to be a singer of course reminds us of Kim, who's now following that same dream and seems to have carved out some freedom from the family in doing so. Did Kim's interest in singing come from Kinn, from bonding with his big brother/wanting to be like him? Did Korn meddle with Kim's career too, when he was young? Does he still try to?

And finally, it occurred to me on this rewatch that there's a bit of ambiguity here in just want kind of competition Kinn entered.

I'd always assumed it was a local competition - maybe one meant for kids, where they would compete first in their region/school and then the winners would move on to a larger, national competition. That would make sense for how Kinn could both win but also quit - he just didn't move on to the next competition.

But the phrasing here could also imply that Kinn went on an actual televised singing show! His family would certainly have the connections to get him on (and hey, they may or may not have a modelling agency now that would totally have hired Jom to star in a new series)...

Can you imagine baby Kinn singing his little heart out under the bright studio lights? How much he would have been adored and hated in equal measures by the viewers at home?

(There may be some who still talk about that weird kid on Thai Idol, who crooned out a bunch of oldies and stole the heart of the judges, but then dramatically bowed out in the very last episode...)

[frazzledsoul]

Not to defend my girl Alicent again because I'm constantly doing that, but the reason she didn't let Heleana get married to Jace was not because she's "an evil, selfish c**t" who hates Heleana and wants her to be miserable (gawd, HOTD discourse is the worst, I swear).

As far as Alicent is concerned, Rhaenyra is dumb, reckless, and prizes her libido above everything else. She's the privileged princess who gets to do whatever she wants because Viserys is always one step behind her cleaning up her mess, and Alicent and her kids are barely acknowledged by him. Yes, she's jealous and resentful, but also she is objectively right. Rhaenyra is a moron who constantly makes terrible decisions. She shamed their family by almost having public sex with Daemon in a brothel, she coerced Criston into sex, she lied to Alicent about the whole ordeal in a sacred space. She could have married any age-appropriate prince in the kingdom and yet she did all that shit anyway. In the time since then, she's had multiple blatantly illegitimate children by her bodyguard and has placed them in line for the throne, endangering the entire family, and yet she keeps doing it anyway and Viserys keeps letting her.

Alicent definitely doesn't have the language for the concept, but she knows Heleana is "special" and will not do well finding a husband and she doesn't want her under the control of another family who will abuse that. She also knows that Viserys doesn't give a shit what happens to any of the younger kids, so it's all up to her to protect Heleana. She doesn't trust Rhaenyra and she knows Viserys won't be around much longer to protect her from the consequences of her actions. That's why she turns down the proposal. Not because she hates Heleana and wants her to be unhappy.

Now, what would have happened if Alicent had agreed to it? Well, Aemond still likely claims Vhagar, he still gets into a fight with Rhaenyra and Daemon's brood and loses his eye, Rhaenyra still likely orders him tortured for publicly outing her "secret", Viserys still takes her side, and Alicent and Rhaenyra still likely get into an altercation. I don't think the proposal would have prevented any of that and Alicent isn't letting Heleana get into Rhaenyra's clutches now that a feud has started among the younger kids and she's vulnerable to violence she can't prevent or even really discuss afterwards. Oh, and then Rhaenyra married Daemon and moves away to a distant castle. There is absolutely no way Alicent is letting Daemon have unlimited access to her baby girl in an environment where she can't escape. Even if she had let Heleana go with them, it probably wouldn't have prevented the fight between the Strong boys and Alicent's sons that happens later, and Luke and Aemond are still probably going to go at it at some point and war will still have happened. Jace may be decent and well-intentioned, but he's also spoiled and can be a hothead, and his intentions won't be able to prevent everything else that is still going to happen.

So, yes. Alicent kept Heleana with her and married her to her brother in order to protect her. She also probably did it because she knew Aegon was reckless and hedonistic just like Rhaenyra, and figured if she kept an eye on both of them she'd be able to control the situation. It was in many ways a bad decision that opened Heleana up to a lot more abuse than she would have gotten from Jace (unfortunately, the possibility that she gives birth to twins at FOURTEEN as a result of sex she didn't want to have is still likely) but Alicent didn't do it because she hated her kids. She wanted to protect them, and in her mind this was the only way to do it.

[draslihanxfahri-bailey]

"... Fine, maybe I know more, but my point still stands!" Would Asli continue this 'argument' for as long as possible? Perhaps. It was all in good fun, after all. She would rather they have this than to genuinely be fighting with him. No words in any of the languages she knew that were in her arsenal could describe how much she loathed fighting with him. Aslihan waited quietly as she watched him make his choice. For a moment, she thought she was going to have to swallow her pride and admit to everyone, unfortunately including the man known as her brother, that she has finally been bested by someone. However, a genuine big smile soon formed as she heard his answer. "I think I can manage that," she mused. "Name when and I'll get right on it. I'll even make you your own homemade batch of potstickers, just to sweeten the deal better."

Passion, for as long as she could remember, was always considered a high value in the Bailey family. Aslihan couldn't imagine a life where she wasn't passionate, especially for her interests. And the older she got, the more things she's grown passionate about. Of course, she knew that it was a rather fortunate and even privilege position for her to be able to act on all of her passions. But she has also tried to make sure to help others to be able to act on their passions. Even if she does lose sleep doing so. Though, that was something she could never complain about. "Hey! I do take breaks every now and then, thank you very much. I'm just... extremely selective concerning them." Though, with her daughter being here soon, it has made her think about things. Decisions and choices that she's contemplating on taking that would result in her being able to have more breaks. Especially one of them, which would be one of the biggest and hardest decisions she'll have made in the past couple of years. Yet, the more she thought about it, the more she understood how right it would be. Even though it wasn't easy, but necessary. And the best step to take in her life right now. Though, she would have to wait a moment and she wanted to talk with Elijah about it before making any decisions. "I'm sure you're doing an amazing job. Trust me, I'm still learning as I'm going and each day is different. Just don't give up, okay?"

It was hard to look at him. She didn't want to admit to him the truth and to make things worse. But... not answering didn't help either. Especially as he looked from her, a clear show that he knew what her answer would've been. It was hard to watch him yet not know what to say to attempt to make things better. Because, in the end, nothing would. Nothing could change what happened, what choices they made, and all of the lost memories they were meant to share together and with Alex yet will never now know what they would've been.

But, there was also that always present need to protect him that showed itself. That was ready to take the blame he tried so hard to carry. This wasn't his fault, after all. And she refused to let him believe that it was. "I wrote you letters," she admitted softly. Her fingers playing with her Magen David slowly yet she tried to continue on. "From the day I found out about her to the day we flew here from London, I wrote you letters. But I couldn't... I tried to send them to you so many times, but I couldn't. I kept them in a few bundles in Alex's baby box and I told myself that I would one day finally send them to you. The amount of times I started writing and drafted emails, where I tried to send you a message through Instagram... I called the rescue once." It was her turn to look away from him. Her eyes shutting tightly to hide the tears that were forming. Shame filled her being and she tried to continue. "I... I heard your voice and for the first time in so long, it wasn't an old video from our time together or from my memories. But I panicked and hanged up. I was just so scared and I... I missed you so much... I was a coward, Atlas. I should've tried harder, done better, and I'm so sorry. None of this was your fault; It's mine."

Dark brown eyes opened at his words. Scanning his features quietly, she smiled softly. "I've faced death before and turned out okay," she joked lightly. Yet, she knew that it wasn't going to help much. Shaking her head, she slowly got up and walked over to Atlas, sitting in the chair closest to him. "You're right," she admitted softly. "I... I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know if I'm going to be okay or not. But... I know that you will be okay. You can do this without me. We've spent the past two years coparenting and taking care of Alex by ourselves, and you've done an incredible job with Alex without me around. You will be okay, no matter the outcome. And you'll still have my family around to help you as well. You... You'll have Eli. And I need you and Eli to lean on each other and raise the girls together in case... in case I do die." Quietly, she reached her hand out to place on his shoulder. "You are capable of so much, Las. You always have been and you always will be. And you are capable of doing this without me. I can promise that. Even if you don't believe that, I believe in you. That has never changed." Her lips pressed together. There were many things she could promise him, but that? She couldn't. She would always try to protect him. Including from what else could happen. "I can't promise you that," she whispered, pulling her hand back from him. Looking down, she noticed the time on her watch and she stood up. "I-I have to go. Eli and I have an appointment in an hour. I'll... I'll see you soon, okay?" ||📜@atlaswilliams

"Seventy seems low for you, so no. I'm not buying it." By comparison, Atlas felt as if he knew nothing at all about the world and the life he lived. It wasn't on the account of her making him feel inferior, but how could anyone stand next to a Bailey and feel as if they'd lived at all? "What do I want? Damn, that's a tough question. Hearing you tell the world that you got bested would be a good one. Especially if I can get a one Theo Bailey upfront and center. A high five is lame. I'm more of a fist bumping guy. I guess if I really have to choose just one," he trailed off, anticipation dripping off his words as his grin slowly grew wider, "then I'm going with a home cooked meal. I'd be an idiot if I passed that up. I think you know what I'm picking too." It was her personal favorite and a dish he'd come to quite enjoy himself, but hadn't had the privilege of enjoying in months.

His passion matched hers in the sense that the wolves were his life, just as research, education, and discovery was hers. While he wasn't the sharpest mind in studies that mattered to the rest of the world, someone would have done well to know more about wolves than he did. Between his time at the rescue and the education he'd obtained at University, it was the one thing he'd always taken seriously enough to give a damn about. Even at his lowest points, the wolves mattered the most. "You should do that thing that people do sometimes, I think it's called taking a break? It could be good for you. I promise things won't fall apart in your absence and if they do, you can blame me for pulling you outta there for a day." She was an important piece to the puzzle at her job, but one day away wouldn't send any establishment crashing to the ground below... he hoped. "I hope so. I'm doing everything I read online. Even singing her a few tunes in the morning. Something about manifestation?" If he believed hard enough, then it would be.

Patience was a virtue. He'd been told such a thousand times and he'd never truly realized what it meant until he'd become a father. Patience meant waiting for a tantrum to pass. Patience meant staring your child in the eyes while they openly defied a very simple request. Patience meant answering every question that left your daughter shot off, even if you don't know the answer.

But this? Waiting for a simple yes or no? It was the most torturous thing that he'd ever experienced in his thirty-something years of living.

Her silence was enough of an answer, as was her gentle plea of his name. Rather than argue in a battle he would never win, he dropped his gaze from hers and focused on a worn wooden board at his feet. She could blame herself all she wanted, but the fix to the silence between them had worked both ways. Sure, she could have called, but he couldn't blame her for staying silent. After all, why would she reach out to a man who'd basically left her behind? A man who hadn't even called to let her know that he'd landed safely, or that he was appreciative of everything she and her family had done for him in those three weeks.

The guilt buckled down and made a home in his chest, but he did his best to mask the overwhelming heaviness that settled there. This wasn't about him. It was about her and her health. Health that had severely been affected by the birth of their daughter and now, she was facing that battle again. "You can't promise that," he countered quietly, voice weak. So much for manifesting anything, right? "I want to believe that you will be, because I can't... I can't do this without you. So, I'm going to believe that you're going to be fine, but you can't... you can't promise that." Alex needed her mother and that wasn't going to change. Atlas needed her too, but it felt selfish beyond his means to mention it. "If something changes... just promise me that you won't try and hide it."

[thestarfishinjootsoffice]

slashers x child reader who just LOVES to sleep and just passes out everywhere. Also can the reader have a lil stuffed bunny that would be sooo cute!

It's like everyone is reading my mind, I was thinking about this a few days ago 🫣

I got lazy at the end I'm sorry 🫠

Slashers x child! Reader who loves sleeping

Michael

Would be lowkey concerned for you, are you not having enough sleep?

Despite the man not caring much about his himself he is worried for you.

he sees you sleep like almost every time he sees you and then starts to calm down. But he wonders why you don't get extremely hyper after sleeping all the time.

But he never saw you full out pass out before so when you did he got really scared. He thought you died. 😭

It was a long day, you got yelled at in class by your teacher for sleeping in and you were forced to stay awake which you almost failed after five seconds but you didn't want to be embarrassed in your whole class again.

You wanted to sleep so badly you started yawning so much even the others around you started yawning.

And when class ended you immediately went to the myers house instead of your parents and the sight of the couch made you passed out, unfortunately you missed the couch but fortunately the bunny you were holding saved you from heading head first onto the ground.

Michael who just witnessed all this was quite distraught, what happened? Did you die of exhaustion??

He tried nudging you but that didn't work you didn't move. So now he was getting really perturbed. He holding you now and shaking you a bit and you still didn't wake up and he was almost close to throwing you out the window because you wouldn't wake up. But then he started hardly gripping on you and that's when you shot up to the sudden pain you felt on your shoulder blade.

"Dad what happened-"

He just squished you in his arms and stomach. Which made you pass out again and it became a cycle like a few more times.

Your teachers body was also found on the news.

(Ps your parents were later questioning why you smelt like dirt and blood)

But it's a win win for both of you since he won't disturb you when you sleep and you don't disturb him when he goes out killing.

sometimes decides to watch you sleep when he's bored and doesn't have the need to kill. Creepy or cute? You decide although he isn't going to stop whatever your opinion on it is.

Sinclair brothers

Bo doesn't mind it much except when you just fall wherever you feel is sleeping on worthy and also when there are tourists and he has to use you because you are perfect when luring them in especially with your cute little bunny. You make victims want to drop on their knees and beg for you to like them. (not in a weird way 💀) but he also feels the same way too. Don't be fooled if he doesn't show it. He has a smol room with the most comfortable blankets and sheets he can find just for you. 🥹 he also lets you snuggle up to him whenever you want to. His face is a bored annoyed looking expression but inside it's "oh my god, this precious baby oh you gorgeous thing *sobbing*"

Vincent slightly worries at how much you sleep and how fast you do but won't question it much. You are welcome in the basement anytime and he lets you sleep in his room when its cold outside, you three (your lil stuffed bunny too) sometimes end up cuddling. He likes having company occasionally but you don't make your presence known that much except for your slight snoring and breathing but that's okay. Atleast you won't see the naked bodies while he does his sculpting.

Lester doesn't mind at all. Actually encourages you to. His thoughts on it are basically "they're just a baby! They need sleep to grow!" He takes you on a drive around the town and sometimes out of town if you like sleeping in his car with your little bunny. If Bo ever catches him in the act of doing this though he may lose his driving you around privileges. He naps with you along with jonesy too. You three four are the cutest trio there can be it makes anyone wanna cry out of cuteness overload.

Bonus: jonesy! She follows you 24/7 to ensure you're safe because what if you're napping outside and there comes a random pedo Or kidnapper in town and they try anything on you. They wouldn't have lasted long anyways because lester and Bo have their eyes everywhere you are in but just to be safe.

Hannibal

That's one of the many things he immediately noticed about you. Your never ending love for sleep. He lets you sleep all you want yes. But he wonders if you're sleep deprived. But he learns that you just really like sleeping and stop wondering.

Gets disturbed everytime you just fall anywhere though, if you're feeling sleepy just tell him and he'll so generously carry you to your comfy luxurious room.

He sketches you sleeping with your bunny and shows it to you when you wake up and chuckles a bit if you get a little weirded out and sketches you even more if you express your love for it but if you're truly uncomfortable by it then he'll stop.

Also will also watch you sleep from time to time. He just loves you and your sleeping face. If your bunny gets old and worn out he'll buy you a new one but he'll adjust it to look more like your old one because he's thoughtful just like that.

He schedules and learns at what time you mostly sleep at and how it takes for you to wake up so that when you wake up you are greeted with fresh warm food and a smily motherly hannibal.

He may or may not send pictures of you to Will... Will shows up at his house to visit you and just watches you untill you wake up so that you three can play together. Yay 🎊 🎉

[imatechbummerliketomholland]

You are my world. you three are my world now - h.h

hello there! I'm back ! Sorry if it tooks so long, i have a lot of work during these holiday. I hope you like this little request. I didn't have time to be proofread (but a big thank you to@petersasteria who is always there to support me!). Remember that my native language is French, so don't be so mean if i made mistakes!

Feel free to like, share, comment and tell me what you think. Send me a message if you want to be added to the taglist for my next work!

Word count: 2300 Warning: angst, mention of pregnancy, small mention of blood, mention of placental abruption Pairing : harry holland Request: yes!

ღღღ

You didn't expect to be pregnant with twins at your age. The announcement of your pregnancy had also surprised more than one. Despite her support, Nikki Holland had still given the discourse on the importance of safe sex to her son. But Harry had given a more than mature speech in defense of both of you. He was able to prove to his family and to yours that you were ready and that the decision to continue the pregnancy was not rash.

You were now at the half of your eighth month and nothing could stand in the way of your happiness.

Nothing except maybe this.

Nikki had offered to have lunch with her this afternoon. Despite his work as a photographer, no longer having the company of his four children - since three of them left the family cocoon to live their own life as grown-up adults- weighed heavily on her. You accepted with pleasure. Harry, who was editing his third short film, had left you this morning to go to the edit suite, not without checking that you were okay. So, you joined Nikki at the restaurant. You shine in your long floral maternity dress. In the middle of the meal, you felt a violent contraction.

At almost eight months pregnant, it was no surprise that you could feel twins’ movements. You winced a little at the pain and your mother-in-law put a reassuring hand on your arm.

"Are you alright, darling?" she asking, a little bit worried.

"Yeah, yeah. They've just been in great shape for a few days now."

You apologized and went to the bathroom, struggling to cope with the pain of your contractions. When you noticed that your underwear was soaked with blood, your heart rate increased. You suddenly realized that a series of symptoms corresponded to what you had dreaded early in your pregnancy: the nausea that had occurred last night, the violent contractions since this morning and now the blood. Rather alerting signals that suggested a placental abruption. The obstetrician told you that this was a possible risk since you were having a twin pregnancy. You started to cry and panic for several minutes that Nikki ended up knocking on the bathroom door.

"Darling, is everything good in there?" she asked you with her sweet and worried voice.

"Could you come in please" you sobbed.

"Sure, darling. Are you sure you're feeling okay?"

She stepped carefully into the disabled cabin that you had used for space reasons. Nikki immediately noticed your state of stress. And you just told her everything in strangled sobs. She put a hand behind your back and gave you a very serious look.

"We have to go to the ER. We're going right away."

"I want Harry"

"Don't worry, I'll call him on the way"

And you haven't wasted a minute. Nikki simply left her phone number and table number at the counter before you got into your car. Dom will retrieve Nikki one's later. Holland family been known from the restaurant, the staff were comprehensive about your leaving without paid the bill. When you arrived at the hospital, the nurses greeted you directly and wasted no time either. You were taken to the operating room without being able to get your boyfriend's support.

☙♥❧

Harry arrived within fifteen minutes of receiving the call from his mother. No doubt he would receive a speeding penalty ticket later. He looked like a madman, mortified by worry. He was a bundle of nerves and sarcasm. Her mother was standing by the reception desk, waiting for her. She looked anxious. Tom was there too, trying to contact their father on his phone. When Dom finally picked up, the oldest Holland brother announced the urgency. Harry was shaking with worry.

"What happened mom?"

"I don't really know, baby. We were at the restaurant and the babies kicked. She went to the bathroom and when she didn't come back, I went after her. That's where she asked me to come into the bathroom and you know the rest. I called you straight after that. " Nikki explained, trying to get the stress out of her.

"Oh my god… where is she now?"

"The medical staff took her for surgery. I had to wait here. I couldn't go with her, baby. I’m so sorry."

"Ok ... Ok, I guess I have to wait here. Hope she's okay. God, please make her be alright."

They all made their way to the operating theater hallway for the public to wait for more information. Tom was still on the phone with his father, explaining that it would be better if he stayed at home with Paddy so as not to overcrowd the waiting room. He promised his father that they would all give news as soon as possible. A nurse in a surgical gown entered ten minutes later.

“Who's the father of miss y/l/n's babies?”

“I am. Harry Holland, I’m the father!” he almost screamed and cried at the same time.

“Come with me”

Nikki stood up cautiously and walked over to the nurse. Harry was ready to follow the nurse without giving any further information to his family.

"Excuse me. Can you give us more information on her condition?" Nikki asked

"Sure. We had an emergency caesarean. The babies are fine but there seem to be some complications with the mother. The surgeon is taking care of her."

"Is she going to be okay?" Harry asked hastily.

"She's losing a lot of blood but we're doing our best. Now please follow me." She said to curly one.

☙♥❧

Harry followed her to the nursery. His heart was pounding in mixed emotions. He was so impatient to meet his babies but at the same time he was worried about you. What if you don't survive from the complications? What was to become of him? Would he be able to live without you? Would he be a good father?

His last question vanished when he saw his two little babies in the incubator. Your twins had arrived about fifteen, almost a month earlier than expected, it was normal that they were in an incubator. Harry was going to have to make sure they put on weight. After filling out a few papers, one of the nurses offered to do some skin-to-skin contact with the twins so that they could get to know the three of them. Harry could not but be impatient with this and once prepared he settled into a seat. He was overcome with emotion, understanding how his parents had felt when Sam and him were born. He completely forgets the time, spending several minutes with his sons, one after the other. Harry knew he would place all his love in the two little beings he had taken turns holding in his arms. He was ready to lift mountains, cross the tides. Part of his mind was on you and he truly hoped he could go through life's trials with you. May your family experience all the times they deserve.

The nurse who had brought him to the nursery go up to him with a half-smile. She was sorry to disturb him during this privileged father-son moment.

"Your ... hm ... miss (y/l/n) is in the recovery room. You can go see her now"

Harry's heart burst with relief. He let out a sigh he didn't know he was holding back. The very new father nodded before placing his son in the nurse's arms so that she could put him back in the incubator. He decided to go find his family who had been waiting too long now. When he entered the waiting room, his mother and brother were still seated. Tom had his elbows on his knees, the phone in his hand. He seemed to be talking to someone. When the actor noticed his brother's presence, he spoke to him.

"Hey mate, Sam's here. Wanna talk to him? What's up? Does y/n's alright? And the twins?"

"Too much question. Give me Sam first!"

But the result was exactly the same. Sam asked the same questions as Tom and Harry winced as he tried to answer consensually.

"Hello to you too, brother. The twins are fine. I swear to God Sam, they look like a mini version of us. Two sons by the way ... y/n is fine, she's in the recovery room, I'm going see her right after that. I wanted to talk to mom and Tom first. "

"Glad to know I'm the last to know." Sam informed sarcastically.

"Hey, I was going to call you but I had to, you know ... go meet my sons. Father's job, it seems."

Sam chuckled behind his phone screen as Harry smirked in a mischievous and petty manner. He ended the call with his twin and turned to his mother and Tom. Nikki made her understand that she had heard, she seemed relieved that you were okay.

"Hey, before I go see y/n ... you want to see your grandsons ... and you, your nephew and godson, asshole."

"Harry, language" said Nikki.

"Of course I want to see my godson, stupid"

"Tom!"

The two brothers smile at each other. Just because one became a father and the other was a movie star, didn't mean they were going to change their ways. It was also their way, both of them, to decompress events. Nikki sighed in annoyance but kept quiet, too happy to meet, even only through a window, her first grandchildren. After a brief walk in front of the nursery, Harry announced that he was going to find you, leaving his family to admire your twins. They seemed so impatient to meet them in person but knew they were going to have to wait while you woke up.

☙♥❧

Harry entered the recovery room and walked over to your bed. You seemed to have already woken up from your artificial sleep. He grabbed your hand to give you the support you needed. A feeling of emptiness was felt in you, your gaze landed on your stomach, flatter than you had seen in recent months. Your eyes widened in panic but the reassuring pressure of Harry's hand drew your attention to him.

"They are fine, my love. They are fine. They are in an incubator in the nursery."

You burst into tears. The emotions being so strong.

"I'm so sorry Harry. I'm sorry ..."

“Hey… hey… you don't have to. You're okay… the twins are okay. And I still love you, I love you more than ever."

"Have you seen them?"

"Yes ... ugly like their father" he joked

You chuckled with a few more tears in your voice. You knew he didn't mean it, but humor was Harry's best way to decompress, and it worked on you too.

"My family is here. You scared the hell out of them. I think Sam was about to order a flight to kick your ass."

You chuckled again. It was so impressive to see the love that reigned in this family. You could never have asked for a better way to build your own family. Harry leaned over to kiss you.

"I love you, y/n. You are my world. you three are my world now"

"I love you more, Harry."

You stayed a few more days before you could get out of the hospital. You had decided to introduce the twins after their own discharge from the hospital. That's why, after almost a month of going back and forth to the nursery, you could finally bring your twins home. So you organized a little visit to Harry's parents.

☙♥❧

The sun was shining on London and you squeezed the doorknob of one of the maxi-cozy, Harry carrying your second son as you opened the door to the Holland family home. You were amazed at the ease with which Harry assumed his role as father. He was doing so well that you fell in love with him again.

"Is there anyone here?" He asked

"We're all in the garden, buddy!" Tom said

"You are obviously in the kitchen, dummy"

"For god's sake, Harry. Come into this fucking garden and let us see the twins!"

You let out a frank laugh as you mentally noted that you were going to have to have a conversation with Harry and his brothers about the vocabulary they were using.

You are therefore entering the garden. You noticed right away that Sam had come all the way from Scotland. Harry must have organized this with him too. You smiled, Nikki rushed over to help you with the change bags and you thanked him.

"So where is my godson?" Tom asked in the same way he did at the FFH premiere when he was looking for Jake Gyllenhal.

"Where's mine?" Sam asked too.

You approached Sam, putting the maxycosy on the table to unbuckle the seat belt and take your son in your arms. Harry was doing the same with your second baby.

"I'm happy to introduce you y/s/n"

"And there's y/s/n(2)." Harry added, so proud.

Everyone raved about the twins as you wipe away a tear, happy and proud. You were so moved by the love that reigned. Harry came to kiss you on the forehead, you closed your eyes, appeased by his gesture. The world could only turn better in his company.

"It's family portrait time!" Nikki said, her camera in her hands. "Tom, please get closer to your brother. Sam, stand next to y / n"

You all followed Nikki's instructions, who couldn't be more than happy to capture this important moment, bringing her work and family life together. You all smiled as you and Harry were in the center of the photo, carrying your twins in your arms. And at that moment, you were sure that your life could not be more beautiful than at this moment.

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

The Perfect Bad Boy (Pt. 16 of 18)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove X Reader

Word count: 3 K

Summary: Working as a lifeguard in the Hawkins Community Pool, you try to fit in after moving from New York. Things were going pretty well when you notice you've been under someone's stare. Billy Hargrove, Hawkins' bad boy, has been staring at you since day one. You never intended to have anything to do with him, judging by the reputation he has. But Billy won't leave you alone, determined to show you his feelings are different this time...

As if your heart flooding you with confusing feelings wasn't enough, there are weird, strange animals lurking in the woods... But those have to be just part of the wild live of the woods surrounding Hawkins... Right?

<- Previous part (15)

Next part (17) ->

{Stranger Things Masterlist}

×

The Loss Of A Friend

You've never been to a funeral. Well, you did, but you were a kid and you didn't know the family friend who was being buried that day. In your child's mind, you didn't get why everyone was wearing black, in uncomfortable silence, crying all day long. You remember clearly that a blue bug got your attention, making your eyes follow its every move, making you smile despite the sad atmosphere.

It couldn't be more different today.

As the coffin is lowered into the ground, where Jason will forever rest now, you hold Billy's hand, the soft fabric of your black dress tickling your tights. You barely feel it though, all your sensations resumed to the weight in your chest, crushing, squeezing your ribs, smashing your heart.

You suddenly remember the day Monica introduced you to Jason. It was the Saturday before you started working at the pool, in the parking lot of Starcourt Mall. He had his little brother on one arm, and the girl walking beside him, tugging on the hem his shirt.

“So that's the new girl.” He said, a smile spreading across his lips as he reached out his hand for you to shyly shake. “I'm Jason, born to bear the weight of being Monica's cousin, but also the coolest guy you'll find in Hawkins.”

That, of course, started a small war of cheesy pick-up lines, insults, and sarcastic comments. You laughed, feeling easily welcomed by Monica's cousin.

Now, what gets your attention is how his young siblings cry, yell, calling out Jason as is he was just sleeping inside the wooden box and would wake up, smile, and start chasing them around again. He won't. Jason is only a memory now.

“I think we should go,” Billy says in a low voice, letting go of your hand to rub your arms softly.

Nodding, you let him guide you to his Camaro, driving you away from the sea of people dressed in black. You've known Jason for such a little time compared to everyone else here, who saw him grow up, studied with him, lived near him for many years. Your pain is just a speck of dust compared to theirs.

When you get home, the sun is setting. You decide to call Diane, just to make sure she's alright, but you don't tell what happened. It would make her come here immediately, and the last thing you need is someone else you care about being in danger. You have to lie, despite hating yourself for it, telling her that your voice is funny because you had to yell a lot with the kids at the pool. But it's better this way. There are more than enough people here you need to worry about.

“Come here,” Billy calls when you finally head to the bedroom. He sits in the bed, back against the headrest and you're quick to crawl into the bed and into his arms. “How are you feeling?”

“I don't know. Sad doesn't really explain it.” Putting your legs over his, you hide your face on his neck, breathing in your favorite cologne, the only one he uses since the day you told him that. “I can't believe I buried Jason. Jason. My crazy-ass friend.” Your voice cracks and you hold back a sob. “I'll never hear those stupid jokes again.”

“I'm so sorry, princess.” There's a pain in his voice too. Billy has been around Jason a bit, mostly with you. But you know he's actually sad because of how broken you are. You can see it in his eyes, that he wish he could take your pain away, and that he's desperate because he doesn't know what to do.

But there's nothing Billy or anyone else could do. You can't fight death. You can't hit it with a baseball bat full of nails until it gives your friend back. The only thing you can do is avenge him. Get whatever took him and destroy it.

“I wanna kill those Demothings.” The anger in your voice is tangible, and you clench your hands into fists. “I swear to God, Billy, I'll kill one of them myself.”

“Anger won't help. We need to be smart about it. We need a strategy.” Billy is often angry with things. Mostly with things that hurt you, but this time, you get why he's taking another path, trying to calm you down instead of putting more wood in the fire. “The meeting is set for tomorrow. We'll find a battle plan to kill those damn things.” His hand comes to lay on your thigh, fingers softly caressing your skin. “But for now you need to rest, ok? I'll cook something you like and then we'll cuddle watching some nice movie. How does that sound?”

“What if I cry through the movie?” You ask because more tears start rolling down, it doesn't matter how many times you try to get rid of them.

“Then I'll hold you tight.”

“Sounds good to me.”

Billy is kind enough to try and get you into some small talk. Nothing too complicated, nothing related to the Demothings or Jason. You're thankful for that. He even manages to get a few laughs from you, although they're always followed by a reality check when the events of the last two days hit you again, and the smile is gone.

A couple of hours later you're watching Jaws, your head on Billy's chest as you try to follow the events of the movie. But it seems way too fast for you, or it's just your mind that's refusing to process anything that's happening.

You just keep thinking about death. About how Jason's whole life was cut short. How all of his plans for the future were erased.

“Billy, can I ask you something?” Keeping your voice low, you speak up for the first time since you came to the living room after having dinner.

“Of course, princess. What is it?”

Biting your lip, you consider if you should really bring that up. It's selfish to talk about your future when someone else won't have one. But this whole situation made you want to make plans because it's a privilege to still be here. It's a blessing to still have time. “What you said to Joyce about... Marriage. Did you really mean that or–” Pushing yourself up from where you were laying on top of him, you take a deep breath. “–or were you just trying to get out of the conversation. Because it's ok if–”

“Haven't I made it clear that I want to be with you for the rest of my life?” He moves to sit up as well, pulling you close until you're placed in between his legs, a hand caressing your cheek. “Because if I hadn't, I'll make it clear now. I want to be with you for the rest of my life. I don't know how it happened, and it did get me by surprise, but the day you walked in the Hawkins Community Pool, I knew something changed in me. I knew I had to get to know you, and I did thought it would pass, that I'd get tired of you as I got of the other girls, but I didn't.” Billy holds you closer to him, your foreheads touching. “You hit me like–”

“Bang.” You finish for him, the memory of the day he was unbelievably honest with you coming back. The day he admitted to you, and somehow to himself too, that he liked you. It was also the day he punched David, and the day he kissed your cheek, making your stomach burn like it has been set on fire.

“Like bang.” He breathes out, warm lips coming in touch with yours. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you pull him as close as you can, the need to feel that he's here, with you, clouding the sound of the TV. Billy moves to lay back down again, and when you move to follow his change of posture, your knee slips and connects to his ribs. “Ouch!” He breathes out, cutting off the kiss.

“Oh, shit. I'm so sorry.” Covering your mouth, you bring the free hand to rub his side. “Sorry, baby.”

Taking a deep breath, he grabs your arm and pulls you down, making you collide on his chest, giggling. “Sorry. I shouldn't be joking around with you now.”

Squinting your eyes at him, you try to get up, but his strong arms come around your body, keeping you from moving. “I hate you, Hargrove.” The fake sentence is soon overcome by a giggle. “I'll kick you right this time, I'm warning you.”

“Oh, I'm shaking like a leaf.”

“Don't test me, Hargrove. Keep in mind we sleep on the same bed and I know all of your habits, baby.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Mhmm.” Mumbling, you manage to stand up, moving back into a sitting position. You know he actually let you go, but there's no reason to acknowledge that. Taking a deep breath, the sudden happiness is stained again, as the memories crawl back. It seems like Billy notices because his smile softens. “I love living with you, you know that, right?”

“I love waking up next to you every morning.”

You can't help the smile that comes to your lips as you bend over again, kissing his lips.

On the next day, Billy calls Anthony to ask him to give you a few days off work. Obviously, you have to urge your hothead boyfriend not to curse the manager and risk losing his job. You feel fine to go to the pool, or you think you do, but the truth is you wouldn't be paying much attention anyway. And much to your dismay, Billy gets a total of zero days off. No discussion, what makes him hang up the phone so hard you thought he broke the poor thing.

Since you don't want to be alone, and Billy would absolutely never allow you to be alone in the house when you're friend just died, he drives you to Joyce's place, where the party will gather to make plans.

Saying it's hard to be away from Billy on the day after you buried Jason is a misunderstanding. Seeing him drive away from Joyce's porch makes you feel like he's taking your heart with him. He didn't seem pleased either, but there was no other choice. You wouldn't make him miss the day, since you know Anthony is a terrible human being, just looking for the right excuse to get rid of the lifeguards.

“Honey, come inside,” Joyce calls a hand on your shoulder. “Can I get you something to eat? We had pizza last night and I have a slice in the fridge.”

“No, thank you, Joyce.” Politely, you decline her offer. “Is there any bed I can crash in?”

“Sure. Come.” Walking through Jonathan and Will, you wave at them, muttering a good morning and trying not to cry at their sad faces. They know Jason was a close friend, and, like everyone else, they don't know what to do or say. “This is Will's and Jonathan's room. Just pick a bed.” Nodding, you choose the one on the left and lie down. “Do you need to talk?”

“There's nothing to say.” Putting your head on a pillow, you stare at the ceiling. You feel comfortable around Joyce, she has this mother thing about her. “I just want this to end. Before anyone else gets... Eaten.” The word makes you shiver as it brings the image of his body back. “I wish I wasn't the one to find him. To... See him that way. I don't think I'll ever forget that.”

“Honey, I'm so sorry.” She comes to sit on the edge of the bed. “When... When they found Will's body, it hurt. I knew in my heart it wasn't him, but the very idea of losing my baby was horrible. So I have an idea of how you feel. Losing someone is a pain that doesn't go away. You'll get used to it, but it remains. All we can do is learn to deal with it and honor them by carrying their memories.”

You're crying through her speech, and you can't help but sit up and hug her, crying on her shoulder. “We have to be careful because I can't lose anyone else.” You're not sure if she can even understand what you're saying, but since she nods, you think she did.

“Don't worry, honey. We'll all be alright.” She pulls away, rubbing both your arms. “The kids will be here soon, but feel free to stay here or join us, ok? Do whatever makes you comfortable.”

“Thanks.” Offering her a small, sad smile, you watch as she leaves.

You hear when they get here, the chattering starts, and you can understand a few words here and there. They talk about you, and about Billy and about the funeral. But soon enough it falls into the major problem. And that's when you tune out, staring at the ceiling, trying not to make yourself too comfortable in someone else's bed.

The only thing you want now is Billy. You want to go back to the time where there was no Demogorgon, Demowhatever lurking around. At least to you. It's weird to know what really happened in Billy's car accident, how he was almost the host for the Mind Flayer. You're happy it didn't happen, that he's here now. You need to thank Max for that, actually. If it wasn't for her and the others, your Billy wouldn't be here. He could be dead, and you'd never meet him. He'd never shoot glances at you, or drive you home, buy you tacos or punch David's face. Or kiss you, hold you, love you. The thought of a life without Billy in it is absurd. Now, more than ever, after you lost someone so dear, you have this need to be with him. Just to make sure he's here.

Breathing out and closing your eyes, your hand comes to hold the necklace. It makes you feel closer to Billy, and there is a silent promise here, one you hold close to your heart, together with the earring.

Eyes open, you get up of the bed. You don't care if you got days off, you have to see him. Even if it's just for a hug. Leaving the bedroom, you make your way to the living room, which is crowded.

“We wait until it's late at night to make sure the Demodogs are out, sneak inside the tunnels, and spill insane amounts of gasoline all over it. Get the hell out, wait until it's morning, and set the whole thing on fire.” Dustin says, hands in the air and a smile on his face.

He's kidding, right? He can't be suggesting that as if it's the greatest idea of the world. “Are you completely insane?” You ask, making your presence known. Arms crossed, your eyes scan through the party. “You can't possibly think this is a good idea.”

“I agree with (Y/N), this is insane,” Joyce adds, her face making it clear she thinks this idea sucks. “I won't let you do that.”

“But–”

“The point is to kill them without getting ourselves killed. And every single idea you come up with has a hundred different ways to get us killed.” Steve says, both his hand on his hips as he paces around the room. “Who thinks this idea sucks raise your hand.” He's the first to do it, and Joyce, you, and Jonathan do the same.

“Count Billy in.” You say, raising the other hand as well.

“And Hopper,” Joyce states, giving you an approving stare.

“It's six against seven. We're doing it.” Dustin exclaims.

“No.” You basically shout, not caring one bit if you sound bossy. All eyes lay on you as you struggle to keep it together. “We're not doing it and that's final.”

“I–”

“I just lost a friend and I will not let you do something that might just end up in another funeral.” There are tears threatening to fall again, but you hold them back. “So come up with something else.”

The silence is deafening. You know you're breaking down again, even though the tears aren't rolling down. Yet.

“Please. There's gotta be something else.” Lowering your voice and looking down at your feet, you beg. You can't even think about someone else dying. You couldn't bear it.

“I saw this thing at school. Like a robot with remote control.” Lucas starts. “If we could build a bunch of them and attach a hose, we could guide it inside the tunnels and spread the gasoline.”

“Yeah, but there are seven holes. Which means a lot of ground we'd have to cover.” Eleven adds as you make your way to the group, sitting on the couch beside Joyce.

“Let's blow up six of them.” You burst out, crossing your legs. “A hell of a explosion that would take those things days to dig it back. Then there will be only one way in and out. Find a hell of a long hose or just connect a bunch of them and a million gallons of gas. The robots will spread it then we'll just need a match.”

“That's good. It could work.” Nancy says. “But we'll need to chip in to buy all these things.

“Hopper can get some for free I'm sure.”

“We start right now.” Mike stands up and the others follow. “Let's get started.”

The rest of the day is hectic. Lists are made, one of the kids teachers come over to help with what they called a summer project. For fun. And the materials started arriving. You don't really know what to do, so you help Joyce make lunch, keeping up with her small talk. Joyce is easy to be around, and you like to hear her stories about Will and Jonathan. You even manage to show a few smiles every now and then. After everyone is fed, you finally sit on the porch, trying to help as much as you can. The kids are genius, literally building remote control robots from random pieces and the instructions from books. It's amazing. Since you can't really be of much help in this aspect, you join Nancy, separating stuff or doing anything they tell you too.

When the sun is setting, some of them had to go home to gather their stuff. They'll crash here and take the robot construction through the night. By the moment you hear the faint noise of Billy's car, it's just Joyce's kids, Steve and Dustin. Leaving the small pieces of metal you were shaping into tiny little circles, you stand up abruptly.

“Where are you going? These circles aren't going to make themselves.” Dustin complains, raising his hands in the air.

“Billy is back.” There's no need for further explanation, so you tiptoe among the stuff, careful not to step on anything.

“It could be anyone.”

“Dustin, is there any other car in Hawkins that sounds like that?” As you speak, the noise gets louder and Billy's car comes to your sight.

“She knows her boyfriend's car.” Steve jokes as you walk to the yard, smiling when Billy stops the car and comes out.

“Miss me, princess?”

“Obviously.” It's a feeling of pure relief to see him. It feels like it's been so much longer than just some hours, but you feel that you'll have this insane need to be around him for a while. Just to enjoy the fact that you're still alive. You can't help but wonder for long the idea of death will hover over you... Probably forever.

“You ok?” He asks, his hand on your hair as you have your head on his chest.

“I will be.” Remembering the audience, you pull away, standing on your toes to kiss him. “Dustin had a terrible idea but I made him change his mind about it.”

“How did you do that?”

“I yelled.” With no intention of further explanation, you turn at the guys. “I'll be back tomorrow morning, alright? Have fun doing crazy science.” Waving at them, you get into the car.

You would like to stay at Joyce's, keep helping as much as you can, but you feel like you need silence and peace. The kid's laughter and jokes make you feel better, but you know that you also need to let the sadness creep over for a while. Keeping it hidden, disguised, makes no good. So as you dry and brush your hair, waiting for Billy to finish his shower, you cry.

For Monica, for Jason's younger siblings, his mother, his father, uncle, and aunt. For every friend he made since he was born. And for yourself too. Jason was one of the people that you imagined you'd be around for the rest of your life.

You're dragged away from your thoughts by the phone's ring. Rushing to answer it, you find it's Joyce, kindly asking if you can pick Mike up and drive him to her place, and of course, you comply.

“Billy.” You call when you hear him coming out of the bathroom. “Joyce needs us to pick up Mike. Nancy can't stop what she's doing there.”

“Sure. Let's go.”

Being out at night makes you anxious, but you try not to let it show. Eyes on the road, you bounce your leg nervously, tugging on the seat belt. Billy notices, and a hand comes to rest on your thigh.

“We'll be fine. Relax.”

“I'm trying.” Stretching your arm, you touch his neck. “I'm sorry if I can't stop thinking about Jason and what happened.”

“(Y/N), you just lost a friend. My responsibility as your boyfriend is to hold and love you through this process. Don't apologize.”

“I don't want this to be your responsibility, Billy.” When he turns his head to look at you, you run your fingers through his jaw.

He takes a deep breath, pulling over by Mike's house. You were about to get out, but since he doesn't move, neither do you. Billy looks like he's thinking, furrowed eyebrows and distant eyes. “Billy? Come back to Earth.” You decide to ask, taking off the belt and turning your body towards his.

“To have and to hold. For better or worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health.” He squints his eyes through the words, trying to remember them. It takes a while for you to understand what he means, and when you do, your heart starts drumming in your ears. “To love and cherish till death do us part.”

“Billy...”

“It means I'll stand by your side. Not because I feel like it's my responsibility, but because I love you. And I'm more than happy to take the responsibility of being your–”

“Couldn't you save that up for, I don't know, someday when I'm dressed in white?” The words come out fast, and you're blushing hard, your cheeks burning. “No. You had to do this now. Drive me insane now in your Camaro.” You roll your eyes dramatically when his lips break into a smile, that smug, cocky smile he has when he knows he got to you somehow.

“Be my wife, (Y/N).”

“No.” It's an utter absurd how hard you have to fight not to say the exact opposite. You want to just burst out the word, here and now, because you're so damn sure you want Billy for the rest of your life. “No, baby. We'll graduate, save up money and you'll make a decent proposal.” You hope he can't notice your hands shaking as you step out of the car, almost stumbling on the sidewalk. His words burn through your mind, sending shivers down your spine. “I won't say I'll marry you in the middle of the sidewalk, in the middle of the night, in front of Mike's house.”

“Did I just make you nervous?” Billy's arms come to encircle your waist, his deep voice, and breath on your hair making you sigh.

“Shut up, Hargrove.” With the sweet sound of his laughter on your ear, you knock on the front door, trying to push him away before someone comes to answer. “Let go.”

“Are you using my cologne again?” As soon as he asks, you feel his nose softly rubbing your neck, what makes you giggle and try to push him away again, uselessly. “You are.”

It wasn't your intention to let him find out, but he always does. “Well, it was–”

The door is suddenly open, a yellowish light hitting your eyes as you try to stand up straighter. The woman standing there gives a step back as if she just saw a ghost. Her eyes fly from Billy and back at you, then all the way back to Billy. It hits you suddenly as you realize she's Mrs. Wheeler, the woman Billy was going to meet on the day the Mind Flayer almost got him. They haven't met or spoken since that day, and you weren't expecting her to look so... Perplexed. You try to read her expression, to understand what the look in her eyes means.

“Hello, Mrs. Wheeler.” You manage to say because Billy clearly won't even try to be polite. You feel his muscles tensing up, as he gets immediately uncomfortable under the woman's stare since she doesn't seem to even try to hide. “Sorry to disturb you. We're here for Mike.”

×

@chloe-skywalker @dpaccione @dreamin-of-dacre @funeral-7 @uncookspaget @youhavemyfantasticbeasts @halloweenbitch2764 @redlovett @multific @shinydixon @nikkixostan @clockworkballerina @nope-thanks

[theeagerone]

Hope you're all having a special day honoring your Dads. And if you aren't, I hope you do something to bring you happiness. I serendipitously met an amazing new friend who offered me a 2 hour meditation course today, and it was the gift to myself I know my Dad would want me to do. My heart goes to out to those who never had a Dad, lost him young, or whose Dads abandoned them. I'm sorry and I am holding space for you today.

I lost mine 10 years ago to lung cancer that had spread to his bone & liver. He lit up a room with his smile and could make anyone feel special. He loved to drum on the dashboard with his giant college ring and he lived for Motown music and to be with his friends. He's the only man I know of who could be traveling and run into someone who had met him _____ years ago at ______. It happened when he visited us in Atlanta, on business trips, once on a hunting trip in Canada, and once at his favorite restaurant...a woman who painted my parents in 1988 (for a wedding gift) remembered him 20 years later!

I never saw him get sick once in my life. He

was still playing golf, fishing, working out, and living his life to the fullest without even knowing he had cancer. The last time I saw him before his diagnosis, I knew something was off. His skin tone was no longer tan and rosy, he was yellow. He was sleeping after work a lot. He said he "just felt tired, probably gettin old". The hardest thing about caring for him through treatments was not just seeing the sickness take over his body and the chemo knock him down, it was how his heart and confidence shattered. He went from the most handsome silver fox to a bald and frail man of 115 pounds who could barely walk across the room. It broke my heart when he looked in the mirror and started crying. But I stayed strong for him and helped him eat, get out of the car, and watch over him when he tired from a long day of visitors. I was strong until the end and I knew I had to be to help him let go. He was in so much pain and really put his body through a lot just to hang on a little longer for my brother and I.

The minute he died in his room surrounded by family, I felt this intense silence. It was almost peaceful. I touched his head and kneeled down to kiss him, then laid down to hug him with my brother. After a few minutes it finally hit me that I would never hug him again. That he wouldn't walk me down the aisle. That he wouldn't teach any grandkids how to fish. That he would never call me again. I had been really strong up to that point and not allowed any thoughts like that to creep in. It was like a storm over my soul, and I lost it. I was crying harder than I ever have, shaking and screaming out in despair. I feel bad in knowing that his hearing was still working and his brain still had electrical activity, I remember thinking "get it together". But at least he knew how much we loved him. How strong his absence would be. When the hearse came to get him at 2am, I remember peacefully feeling out of my body, like I was floating and seeing myself go through this. The movie of my life. I didn't let anyone put a sheet over him until he was in the car. For some reason the driver had death metal on and I took him aside and said "please put the music on something softer... preferably oldies... just for the next hour".

I feel immensely grateful I had him for almost 22 years. I feel grateful for how much he loved me, took me on stroller walks every day after work, how hard he worked for us to live a comfortable, privileged life. I feel grateful for all the Christmases, the summers, the 4th of Julys, and the events he showed up for. Football and soccer games, horse shows, HS graduations. I feel grateful he let me debate with him and tried to listen when I was hurt or upset or questioning his thinking. I feel grateful he always apologized within the night. I feel grateful for the moment he asked me to walk up to his Dad's casket with him. I was probably 16. He leaned on me to cry. He must've felt vulnerable and safer with me than I realized at the time. I am so grateful he accepted me into his home to stand by his side as he battled cancer. I am blessed for the many gifts he gave me and that I was his only daughter.

It took me a year to stop bursting into tears almost every day. It felt so random - when I saw girls with their dads, when I heard his favorite music (the Temptations, Sam Cooke, the Four Tops), when I saw a well-dressed man in a pink button up shirt, a silver haired man, or a frail man. It took me 3 years to stop running from my pain and feel calm enough to focus on something for longer than 20 min. It took me 7 years to live life without feeling afraid I would disappoint him or that he was "watching". It took me 9 years to ask for help with a therapist and feel truly free again. I am just now learning how to call in his energy to assist or guide me. Losing his sister to a car accident 5 years after his death made me more aware of how blessed we were to be able to say goodbye and hold him as he died.

All of you will go through this, and it's my prayer today that you will live more presently, be a bit more gracious for the moments you have with your parents, communicate with them so they are more aware of what you need, learn also what they need, prepare yourself to care for them in the same ways they cared for you as a baby, and be at peace when you say goodbye. Many who don't have fathers may have a special man in their life that teach them the things a Dad would. They may only have a special teacher or uncle or neighbor or fam friend who helped them feel that tenderness. Reach out to those men, especially the childless ones. They are glad to give their energy and they need to feel appreciated today too. I wish you all love, gentleness, & peace.

[andypridee]

A River’s Current | Challenge #1

here it is. i bring to you Andromeda Pride. well, andy preferably. I’m so sorry this is up sooo late but writing this was kind of a whirlwind. Please ignore any mistakes, i was writing this like a thousand miles per hour. Thank you sooo much to @arin-schreave and @itssara-oc for the rps i hope i wasn’t such a mess. so i leave you with andy. i hope you reading her as much as i enjoyed creating her.

bon appetit!

Silence flooded the room entirely. The day that just happened had been a whirlwind of things that made me completely uncomfortable. "Oh my God," I thought "This is going to continue for who knows how long" This was clearly the best time to understand the magnitude of my actions. Normally, I didn't think much before acting, but the consequences were not so huge. "Okay Andy, you're already here and there is no escape. Breathe. "

The huge room that had touched me was like a dream. A huge soft bed, a wardrobe that was a work of art in itself, a movie ceiling. "I guess this is it. The selection." A contest to win the prince's hand. Not even that. A contest to win what remains of the prince's heart, if it remains, to be able to one day be the queen of this country, although, in reality, it would only be an accessory for the king and his baby factory because obviously you have to follow the lineage And that's what women are for.

It was incredible that I could be and live, even for a short time, in a room as full of luxuries as that. Yes, my childhood had been privileged, I was aware of that, but this was just another level. He had seen, known and connected to so many places that not even in his deepest dreams could they have dreamed of something like this. And there were people who had so much power and money that this kind of room was simply a "guest room." It was increasingly difficult for me to think that solutions for millions of people were in the hands of a few who should actually provide solutions for those people.

How I wish Sierra had been there.

Anger and helplessness began to grow within me. The air didn't flow to my lungs and I had suddenly started hyperventilating. I went out on my balcony and saw around me. Everything looked so serene from afar. So uniform and so peaceful. I wanted to dive into it, keep walking until I got away from that huge and pretentious place. The edge of the balcony felt like a wall of bars to me. I was not made to live observing. And I didn't even know what I was doing here. I had no princess spirit, much less a queen. I needed to get out, talk, be able to experiment and especially help. Not standing still, looking pretty, saying the things that everyone wants to hear but being hopeful enough for those people who have almost nothing. Everything methodical, everything calculated. All coldly experienced, knowing that even if you want to do something and help, that would not make everyone happy, especially the most important ones. Living not in a home, but in an institution.

I closed my eyes for a moment and breathed. I saw a valley covered by the moon. Miles and miles spread before me, ready to be explored, ready for the unexpected. The cold air brushed my cheeks and I smiled. Then came the sea, with its smell of salt and freedom. The sun caressed my skin and comforted me. In the distance, seagulls were observed in mid-flight. This was what made me get up every morning. The possibility of a new, just, and caring world. A world wherein every place that the sea touched you could feel airs of hope and happiness.

I slowly opened my eyes and took another deep breath. I guess I couldn't do anything about my current situation anymore but I could take advantage of it.

I went to sleep with that image of the sea in my mind and I didn't wake up again until the morning rays touched my skin.

When I opened my eyes the day had already started without me. My maids, Audrey, Kate and Elaine, were fixing my room for a new day. Although I did not really understand why since everything looked extremely resplendent. The bathroom apparently was ready to tell from the condensation on the mirror and my outfit for the day hung neatly from the closet.

I closed my eyes once more wanting to be in my room in Zuni, or even in Waverly's bedrooms. Or anywhere outside of there. I opened my eyes again with the slightest hope that my wishes would come true. Obviously, they didn't, so I sighed and walked into the bathroom, ready to have at least 15 minutes of relaxation and privacy. That was, of course, until my maids started helping me.

"Um, ladies? I don't really know what to call them. Girls? Um well, I can do this alone if you don't mind. ”I tried to speak kindly to them.

"But, miss, we must help you in everything," Audrey replied in a concerned tone.

"I'm sure it doesn't refer to everything," I said, pointing to my body in the process.

"It is our duty, Miss Andromeda," Audrey replied politely.

I sighed “Okay, you can continue to do whatever other crazy duty you are dictated here but please just call me Andy. It is the only thing I ask of you. ” I said almost pleading.

"Okay, Lady Andy," Audrey answered again, who, apparently, was the one in charge of the three.

"Andy, Audrey. Andy. " I looked at her and tried to smile slightly.

"Okay La- Andy," she replied uncomfortably, but she had fulfilled what she had asked and that was an advance for me in the little that I had taken that morning, so I left it like that and I decided to violate what I considered privacy as too many levels.

-

OK. I was not a girl in dresses. And that was clearly inconvenient now. Looking at me in the mirror, I looked like a cupcake. Literally. It smelled of vanilla and everything. The dress itself was beautiful, white with gold accents and such a neat chest. Truly a work of art. But I was not wearing dresses. I felt uncomfortable and constricted, I could hardly breathe, and my arms could not rise more than 10 cm.

And now she was supposed to have breakfast in front of the queen and the royal family like that. Fantastic.

"Miss, you must go to your lesson," Elaine warned me before leaving.

"Lesson? Are we not supposed to have breakfast? ” I asked, starting to feel like my stomach was roaring under the tight corset of my cupcake dress.

"Before having breakfast in front of the royal family you must take an etiquette lesson." answered.

"They think we don't know how to eat? It can't be that different. Finally, it is the same process, you eat and drink. There is not much science. ”

"It is a requirement for all the selected ones," Elaine replied, trying not to get too agitated.

"So now I am that. One "selected". " I said, this time to myself. "Okay, I'll be down soon," I replied, a little more disappointed.

Going down that huge staircase I could see the other girls. All dressed in extremely precious dresses. Splendid walk. Perfect complexion. Hair like silk. And I, holding on tightly to the stair railing, afraid of losing my balance and hitting the living room on the floor. What a contrast.

I entered a large room, where tables were set up with their respective chairs. Several selected ones were already arranged in their places, so I looked for mine in that sea of ​​linen tablecloths and flowers with artificial smells.

Lady Andromeda

Thanks, mom and dad. They seriously couldn't choose another name.

I took a seat and turned the side of the card with my name face down. Then I smoothed down my dress and waited for something to happen, though I wasn't really sure what that would look like.

Finally, Princess Safiya entered the room and addressed us. She exuded airs of elegance and neatness. Almost like her brother but she seemed under control and ready to take charge of any situation.

"Good morning. I'm sure you're all ... eager to start seeing as you're meeting my brother shortly, so I'll try to keep this brief. ”

Eager? Really? Rather terrified of having to meet the prince. Oh, my God. Prince. Know him. Friend, if you want you can have me there all morning because we could say that the prince was not my favourite person in the royal family.

“Today I will begin to instruct you on conduct and protocol, a process that will continue for the duration of your stay. Please know that I will be reporting any missteps on your part to the royal family. ”

This was the most outrageous thing anyone could have said to me. Conduct and protocol? Who I am? A doll? What were the behaviour and protocol? To silence your mouth only and that everything is calm and courteous. Crap.

"I know it sounds harsh, but this isn't a game to be taken lightly. Someone in this room will be the next princess of Illéa. It is no small task. You must endeavour to elevate yourselves, no matter your previous station. You will become ladies from the ground up. And this very morning, you will receive your first lesson. ”

That was exasperating me, that situation they have to change their way of being because we do not consider it highly appropriate. She understood that they were the royal family but they were also ordinary humans. She didn't understand the need to be stiff and perfect all the time, much less at breakfast. It was quite a facade, because, let's be honest, who dresses like that to go to breakfast?

Suddenly, a very elegant brunette woman entered the room. It was Felicity Graham, the prince's ex-fiancée. She saw herself as a powerful woman, even on her own and without any ties to royalty or politics. She was the first person to impress me in the background since I got there.

He approached Princess Safiya and muttered something to her, and so they had an exchange of murmurs and increased the discomfort in the room by 87%.

Neither of us knew what was happening and I personally felt out of place and worse yet, too hungry to have a good attitude. We were there in front of them and they didn't even bother to make excuses.

I was about to get up and go get my well-deserved breakfast without any consideration of what might happen because I honestly didn't care. The faster I got out of there, the better. Safiya said something softly to Felicity but I didn't really bother to understand. Were they really taking away even more time?

“Table manners are very important, and before you can eat in front of the royal family, you must be aware of certain etiquette. The faster we get through this little lesson, the sooner you get to have your breakfasts, so faces forward, please. ”

Against my own will, I followed the instructions and continued the etiquette lesson, ridiculous as that sounds, albeit with some difficulty thanks to my dress. In the end, it was what was going to get me out of here and give me my breakfast without having to disrespect the princess in her face. Despite everything, I had always admired Princess Safiya for her tenacity and intelligence and she was frank, a quality that I will always respect people.

When mentioning the very retrograde etiquette instructions, there were one to two times that I almost laughed out loud. Not speak unless they spoke to us first? Really? She did not know that modernity and feminine emancipation had not reached the court of Illea. Even more so when our president was a woman like the queen.

"If you follow this one, I’ll be disappointed," Safiya added.

Well, one less person to disappoint, and at least the princess agrees with me on that ridiculous rule.

After something akin to a courtesy practice, although it seemed more like a classy torture session, and Princess Safiya completely reproved me with her eyes, we were free. My stomach at this moment was a huge furious mass and when my eyes looked at that oasis called buffet I swear that the angels sang. I'm not fully aware but I think I approached the buffet unusual and not very elegantly, filling my plate with delicacies.

I found my seat and got ready to ... eat. Actually, at first, it seemed like I was stuffed but I hadn't eaten anything since I woke up and that was going to be like two hours! But after the first three or four bites, I tried to keep my composure. Not because they had pointed it out to me but because I wanted to show them that we were perfectly fit people to eat without making a mess.

As soon as the guard who was going to escort me to that small room where the girls came and went came, my back stiffened. Usually, it was good under pressure and I wasn't nervous but this time we were talking about the prince, the actual price. I think the usual was not suitable for those occasions.

I got up from my chair with all the grace that can emanate and accompanied the guard to that little room. The first thing I glimpsed upon entering was the cameras. They were everywhere, pointing at different angles to a chair in the middle of everything. And there was Prince Arin waiting for me, standing a little too straight, a little too stiff, very rehearsed. I approached dubiously, looking back a moment but looking back at the prince, who gave me a small bow.

"Good morning, Lady ..." Her eyes searched for my little tag with my name on it. I guess learning 35 names overnight was difficult. "Andromeda." I almost winced when he said my name. Today had been a perfect day to call me Andromeda. "Please have a seat," he said as he gestured toward the sofa.

I did not know what to answer. My mind had gone blank. She only knew that she was in front of the prince, the heir of Illea. It was as if my conscious part had come out of my body and I was making a fool of myself. I bowed very badly and approached him. Safiya would certainly be disappointed in me, I thought.

"Hello! ... um... Good morning, Your Highness" I answered and took a seat on the sofa. "What the hell are you doing Andy? How old are you? Twelve? Act like a fully capable young lady and stop being silly. ” I said to myself as I tried to get comfortable on the sofa. Glancing back at Arin, I tried to smile slightly, concealing my disagreement.

He had settled next to me, turning his body so he could see me properly. There was something about his actions like they were too methodical and too rehearsed. He didn't seem like a natural person.

"How is your morning going?" he asked in a calm but neat tone of voice. How many times had she done this? He was probably not even paying attention anymore, just following a script and waiting for the morning to pass without any complications.

I, on the other hand, was a disaster. And the most irritating thing was that that wasn't me. I looked him in the eye and I got myself back together. "It's just someone else, there's no reason to be intimidated."

“Well let's say waking up inside a golden palace is a whole other way to start my morning, so pretty good so far. I must say, that breakfast of yours is going to spoil my appetite ”I said, while shaking my head, amused. I wasn't going to tell lies, that breakfast had been the best part of my morning.

He simply nodded and continued.

That’s good to hear. So you slept well then? ”

Again that studied tone. Breathe Although she wanted to explode, I continued the conversation, trying to cheer her up a bit. If he didn't want to have a good time, it was his problem.

"Like a dream, but you must know. I was a bit shocked at first when I got to my bedroom but then I calmed down. ” yes .. that little crisis.

"I'm glad to hear you were able to calm down." He looked for a moment at the cameras. Was that necessary? It was silly to ask, considering my experience with the bathroom that morning. "Which province are you from?"

I instinctively turned my gaze to the cameras for a second, uncomfortable with the situation. A mouse in a laboratory would have felt more comfortable than me. For a moment I felt my dress tighter, my hair straighter, my shoes smaller. I turned my gaze to Arin and replied. He continued to ask me questions and I answered them for a while. The weird thing was that he didn't comment on it like he wasn't even listening to me. I was trying to keep my composure but I was already exhausted. I wanted, first of all, to put on a good pair of pants and a shirt. Sleep all day and in the morning embark anywhere. Probably a remote island, accompanied only by Clifford and a coconut called René.

As the conversation progressed, I became more interested in it. A feeling of relief flooded my body and when I realized I was actually enjoying the conversation.

"It sounds like you enjoy it," he comments as he nods slightly.

"I do ... I think it’s a powerful way to tell the world’s history." I replied, a little excited.

"Do you plan on returning to journalism?"

"I have not abandoned journalism, it's just that I work for an NGO so that keeps me busy"

"What do you do there?"

"Well, I'm practically a wildcard. I've taught English and Maths to kids in Vietnam, I've helped to bring food to war-displaced communities, I've aided to build houses for a community made up of women, victims of family abuse, there's everything where you can help. "

Talking about my job was something I loved, but I didn't want to sound pretentious or anything like that, so I was glad when she continued to genuinely be interested in the conversation, or so it seemed.

He nodded, impressed and continued. That certainly sounds like a lot. I'm sure your family must be proud. ”

It was annoying that his only reaction to everything was to nod but he was so wrapped up in the conversation that I barely noticed. At the mention of my family, I gave a little laugh, funny.

Well, I don’t know. I'm sure my family thinks they contribute a lot to society as well. For my parents especially, it's just a complicated way to help when you can just donate a bunch of money and leave. ”

"Oh well, I'd be proud if I were them. It’s important to contribute to the ways you can. ”

"It is. It absolutely is. I believe that making change happen is the labour of everyone. Grain by grain great things can be built. ”

She nodded, again, and glanced at her watch, then turned to look at me.

"Thank you for speaking with me this morning, Lady Andromeda. It’s been a pleasure. ” She got up from the sofa, saying goodbye. "Please enjoy the rest of your stay."

"I'm sure that my stay he meant two hours while he finished with the rest of the girls," I thought.

But I tried to hide my true thoughts, so I got up and smiled confidently. Whatever happened, I think it would be fine.

“It has been surprisingly a pleasure. And please, call me Andy. My parents have been a little extra since ancient times. ” I joked, trying to make the stiff prince smile for the last time.

And fulfilling my goal, Arin smiled at me and nodded again. "This man and his head," I thought. But I did not care, I got him to show some emotion and that already progressed for me.

"Have a good rest of your morning, Andy."

-

“My parents thought so too but believe me, growing up as Andromeda was pretty tired. "I shrugged." Well, I don't believe so, for now, you are my only friend” me briefly, joking, as I usually did, about my name “the food here is the most heavenly thing ”

She was an extremely sweet and funny girl. I think it was a relief to be able to talk to someone without being afraid of being judged in the background, something very rare to find in the social circles that my parents made me frequent.

She giggled and answered “I can imagine. It's a beautiful name but it's pretty long and I'm assuming people have mispronounced it before? ” Her eyes lit up at the mention of our possible friendship ”That sounds like a deal. I'm your friend and you are mine. Don't take backs. ” And continuing with our conversation he added “It is pretty good. Where are you from? ”

“So many times! plus it is pretty weird so you can imagine ”I shrugged. "Sounds like a deal!" I told her and reached out my hand to close the deal, she took it, laughing, and we shook hands with each other but “From Zuni, originally. What about you? ”

"I kind of get your pain. Not many people know how to pronounce my last name. I'm from Whites! ”

"Well, I sure hope I'm pronouncing it correctly." I giggled a bit, something slightly unusual for me. "Oh! that's a great contrast ”I commented when listening to her native province.

"Don't worry, you're actually doing pretty good." She beamed and continued “It is! So what did you do before… ”she pointed around us, referring to La Selección“ all of this. ”

I smiled nostalgic, thinking about the life I had left behind. That life that had been built by me and only by me, and which was now thousands of miles from my reach.

“Well, I study journalism in Waverly and I work for an NGO, helping in poor communities. what about you? ”

“I have been volunteering in the orphanage here and there. I want to keep volunteering but the career I have makes it hard. ” she pouted a bit, making me smile. Sara was the sweetest person I’ve ever known. Usually, my friends and I expressed love with jokes and sarcasm, so hanging out with Sara was actually pretty recomforting. "I am a manager in my dad's business."

We talk about our jobs and our family. The more time passed, the more relaxed I felt, forgetting everything that had happened in the morning and feeling much more myself. Sara was a very sweet, interesting and impressive person. Being a manager in her father's store and volunteering. It is completely true that appearances are deceiving. At first glance, Sara seemed a very elegant but somewhat reserved person. Turned out to be funny and energetic. With airs of princess everywhere and kindness of heart, I was glad that there were girls with possibilities of winning, like Sara and genuinely began to root for her. We ended up talking about my family, especially my sister, Sierra. My sister was one of the people I missed the most and it had only been a day. We usually parted for months but we were a phone call away. This was completely different and he needed her more than ever.

"I'm lucky to have her. I believe that without her I wouldn't be here right now, ”I smiled wistfully, trying to control my tears instead. “Alright, so topic change because I don’t want to have mascara all over my face and make a fool of myself the first day, mmm what do you like to do outside work?”

Sara smiles and said “You really are the sweetest aren't you…” she gave me a sympathetic look and answered my question. Alright. We can definitely do that another day! ” * joked, making me smile and improve my spirits. "I? Well, I enjoy to read and write. Bullet journaling. Geocaching! I would love to travel more often. I love to learn more about different places. How about you? ”

"Count me in! crying out loud is one of my favourite things ever ”I commented sarcastically. “I have tried to do bullet journaling, trust me, it did not go well. But geocaching? what’s that? ” I've never heard of anything like that but I was truly curious "I LOVE-" had started screaming but then I remembered that morning's sermon and decided it was too early to start breaking the rules. "I love travelling!! it's my favourite thing to do in the whole world, I love to discover how diverse we can be in just one planet. I love photography as well, I have an album with all my trips, to see how a picture can tell a million words and a million emotions. ”

"I mean watching some sad movies can get you to cry out loud" Sara joked, continuing my joke. "Oh, I love it! Oh, geocaching is a bit of a weird hobby of mine. It's basically using GPS to find hidden treasures people have left behind. It's interesting for me. ” added with some regret. “I love travelling as well !! Are we possible soulmates? Long lost sisters? ” I smile with her eyes lit up. "Wow really? I would love to see it. Your album I mean. "

"Only if it's titanic" I joked. "But it sounds interesting like catching Pokémons or something like that, you have to invite me some time" I smiled, interested in my friend's hobby.

"I know! it's crazy!” I laughed and continued "where have you been?” And finally answered her request. “Well I could show it to you sometime, I secretly sneaked it in because my mother almost banned me from bringing it, ”I whispered.

"Obviously only titanic." she chuckled, joking. "It is! I have found several interesting things when I go geocaching. ” she grinned as I mentioned my interest in geocaching “Someday for sure!” she said, smiling widely. "It is! I hope to do that often. Travel I mean. I have been here and there but I barely had time to really immerse myself to each province. The farthest I've gone is New Asia. ” she leaned in when I started whispering “Oh really? I would love to see it. I'm glad you sneaked it in. ”

------

The sun had begun to set over the city of Angeles and a beautiful yellow light sheltered the city. The day that just passed had been, honestly, an emotional roller coaster. I had survived my first day of the Selection and I still hadn't made a complete fool of myself. I didn't know if I was going to be there in 24 hours or if this was only going to be a one-day vacation but at that point, it didn't matter anymore. Despite all my opinions regarding the Selection and what was happening, I was beginning to realize that not everything was completely bad and that in reality if I could not change the course of the river, I could at least travel with the current. I was afraid that maybe I would lose myself in the process for, apparently, it was something I couldn't control. The only thing I could do was make sure that day after day when I looked in the mirror, I kept seeing the same girl who wanted to contribute to the change. No matter what happened.

[the-firebird69]

Trump Coup Lawyer John Eastman Loses Another Round In Court - Above the LawAbove the Law

It says two emails implicate Trump in an attempt to overflow overthrow the American government after the election the new president is in he attempted to forcibly take over the capital these two emails indicate that's what he did the state of Colorado has a law that says the University of Colorado emails are available for viewing accessible and cannot be hidden in this case and in any case court is looking for it or other party for that matter and if that's accurate about Colorado law then he's screwed because it says an indicates the attempted a coup just like America or some sort of third world nation

Zues Hera

It goes on to say that the law reads that if you claim privilege you must claim it with the university you know it does not say that in any way he's trying to claim privilege by suing the University in that his records should be kept private and you can't really do that with the state and the law says it can't be kept private especially from law enforcement it does say that certain records can be kept private but it does also say that none of them can from law enforcement the university is not a secretive organization and unless a lab is labeled top secret which in this case it was not and his work was not secret with the government in any way that is not going to be kept secret and when they do that they keep them off the university websites because it's a huge leak they're in separate buildings as well and his brother Brian was not and it was more or less illegal what they're doing then they had spies there and they knew about it and they let him do it because they're trying to implicate him later and michelino I don't know I guess you get an implicated too so you got paranoid and said I didn't want I guess this configuration might not be all set also wholesome to the FBI it's not my opinion this is what I think how the law reads so he looked at and said well if they're not spies and if your lab requires clearance so he said it doesn't yes it does it does because it houses class A biohazard whatever you want to say class so he goes like this wow it right up on the law and then it said it and who is it oh do you see death price oh s***possibly are Harvard just doesn't do any work of value anymore he started laughing and said well it looks around and said this sucks what do I do I say I don't know see if they actually can clear the clearance a lot of times they can so he did that he said it straight and they're still there these people are pretty smart and forced it anyways got around it wants to know how BJ's at glaring a few minutes ago now is babbling and he says this I need their research all sudden you said well they're spying on you not the other way around I said okay but I don't really have anything for them to see DJ started laughing cuz he's an idiot

A lot of you are so dumb and jaded they don't get what's going on now some points this out about Trump he's an a****** to me he's a moron and he is a flavorless dick meaning that he runs around and causes everybody to have a lousy life and we don't like him or his people because of all those things completely hates him and Trump says it's on purpose and so are killing him and to prove it we're going after him tonight and we're going to demolish all his cloning all of it we're going to remove It Lock stock and barrel I'm going to take out all of his armament too and always heavy and all of his ammo guns in every single thing that he's got that's illegal I'm so tired of hearing running around our son screaming like a little baby and he won't leave alone taunting him and taunting him and taunting him we're going to turn around and use the heavy and ammo on him to get the rest of it I'm going to use nights and White satin and huge huge numbers numbers that will matter his own idiots coming back at him half of the ones that ran in today were saved half yesterday it's an army of about 400 quadrillion each day I'm going to wipe out his areas so the idiot will stay away that's what needs to be done but we have to do something and we're proceeding Hera and Zeus are sending their stamp and I'm sending mine. A huge deal a very important day and I'm going to go for approval and we're going to set up huge teams and I'm going to order them in and if anyone wants to add to it that's fine but we're going to order sufficient numbers in and it's going on now

Thor Freya

[pappydaddy]

Obx anon here lmao I hope you're not sick of me. 😭😂

I definitely agree the whole Kie vs her parents arc was very badly handled bc it made her seem more ungrateful than she probably is. I just really couldn't stand her this season, I mean she wasn't my fav character to begin with she definitely already had those moments in S1. I mean she was 80% annoyed with something this season sooo... 💀

I'm kinda surprised that so many ship her with JJ bc I got the impression from her she's rather their friend than be romantically interested in any of them. Like she mostly acts annoyed around JJ, for example in S2ep10 when they both stayed together in the ship container she literally rolled her eyes at him while saying "now it's only us" , so I'm sorry I can't really get on board with this when 85% of their interactions are like this. Or maybe it's just me because I love JJ so much and I think he deserves better idk please don't come for me. 😭 I can totally see her in a relationship outside the friend group plus it's super weird if she would go through every guy in her circle idk. The entire Pope thing was so unnecessary and I still hate her for playing him like that.

Dude I'm way too invested in this show I basically binged the entire thing in two days bc I refused to watch it until this year. I already knew this would happen based on the things I saw on the Internet and I didn't want to add another fictional white boy to my list of characters I'm hopelessly in love with, but here I am daydreaming about JJ Maybank like I predicted a year ago. 🙃🤦🏻‍♀️💀 (might fuck around and start writing fanfics for him bc I can't help myself)

Definitely a highlight of this season was JJ stealing a fucking ambulance bc ofc he would. Like he's so loyal to his friends my heart can't handle this 😭❤️ He definitely has Steve Harrington energy another white boy who stole my heart 😂🙃 I wish both would get more development as normal characters and are not treated as punching bags (literally) and comic relief characters.

I can't wait for season 3 and how this entire thing ends (I heard there will be only three seasons so correct me if I'm wrong). How the fuck will they escape from the island and when will the Camerons finally face the consequences for their actions? 🙃😬

Of course I'm not sick of you lovely! I love when you guys interact with me like this!

I get what you mean, I feel like the situation between Kie and her parents was handled poorly on both their parts, but I feel like Kie's faults were a bit (teeny) more excusable as she is a teen who thought her best friends had died and then had her parents tell her she couldn't hang out with her friends anymore. But overall, aside from her situation with her parents, Kie did annoy me in both seasons. I really hope in season three, there is more character development for her because she is a good character and has strong morals, but I just feel like she's a bit lost in herself. Which is a big reason I don't like her and JJ together. I just feel like they both have such strong personalities and they would only draw out the worst in each other. I also picked up on the things you pointed out about Kie acting annoyed with JJ and that's another reason I feel like they wouldn't be a good match romantically - more like a brother/sister kinda match would be better I feel. For next season, I would love for Kie to find another person outside of the main circle as well, I feel like that would not only be good for her character development, but it would be interesting for the plot since she is usually the person who doesn't like new people joining the group. And I know I said this before, but it would be great if she was LGBTQ+ because I feel like the writers could incorporate her past behaviours and such into the internalized anger she felt towards herself for being part of the LGBTQ+ because I feel like that is something many people in the community still battle internally about even if they are accepting and I know that a lot of bi people still deal with those feelings (spoken from experience).

My take on the Pope/Kie thing was that Kie knew she didn't like Pope that way. And even if, for a second, she thought she might like him that way, when he stopped her before they had sex expressing how he didn't want to do it if there was a possibility that it would mess up their friendship - she should have respected that and maybe they could have felt the relationship out a bit more before going all in. Especially because it was Pope's first time. I love Kie, I really do, I know it doesn't seem like it from this post, but I feel like the writers aren't doing her character justice. Just like Greys Anatomy destroyed Izzie's character.

Also, don't worry, I binged the entirety of season 2 in one day. Nonstop. I laid in bed for ~10 hours just watching the show because I worked 8 hours the next day and I knew I was gonna be too tired when I got home to watch it and I needed to finish it for my sanity. When I first started watching, I knew JJ was gonna be someone I fell in love with because he is the type I usually fall for, so I tried really hard to fight against it, but I am a white man's whore so I ended up losing. But Pope is my baby, I want to protect him and just save him from everything so it's not just JJ who I am in love with from the show. IF YOU START WRITING FOR JJ PLEASE SEND ME THE FICS I WOULD LOVE TO SUPPORT YOU! I ALSO HAVE A HARD TIME FINDING FICS BECAUSE THEY NEVER COME ACROSS MY DASH SO!

BUT 100%, START WRITING FOR JJ, THERE IS NOT NEARLY ENOUGH OBX CONTENT ANYMORE! YOU WOULD BE AWESOME, TRUST ME, YOU HAVE A REALLY GOOD SENSE ABOUT THE CHARACTERS FOR JUST WATCHING THE ENTIRE SERIES IN TWO DAYS! IF YOU NEED ANY HELP REACH OUT!

And JJ def gives off more chaotic Steve vibes. Loyal, a little dumb sometimes, his heart in the right place, crappy parents, etc. It's pretty much a dead match. Even in between last season and this season, JJ had a lot of character development. He seemed more calm this season, he wasn't getting in fights every episodes. But, I agree, both characters def need more character development and to be beat up less.

I haven't heard anything about them being signed on for more seasons yet, so I'm not sure how many seasons there are going to be. But saying as though it's still in the top 10 and lot of people are streaming it, I feel hopeful that Netflix isn't gonna just cancel it like they love to do. I have a feeling that they might sign on for more than three seasons if the actors are willing (hopefully) since it is such a popular show.

I think they will probably pick up next season with a search being conducted, but I have a sneaking suspicion that Pope will figure a way to get them off or lure help to them. Maybe the coast guard will stumble upon them or Pope will do some cool shit to send a distress signal to them. But since this show is really realistic when it comes to the privileges that rich, powerful, white men hold, I have a sneaking suspicion that Rafe and Ward won't face the consequences for their actions, especially not if Rose continues to help them.

But, please, oh please, start writing for JJ and send me your fics, I would love to read them and support you! I started this blog and writing my fics just because I wanted to try my hand at them, but I also didn't want them cluttering up from drive. I just had so many ideas swirling around my head and I needed a place to put them. I have not regretted the decision to start this blog. It's been the best year. I found so many great people who are supportive, I found followers who are supportive and put up with my randomness and my rants about my life and family. If you need any help getting started, never hesitate to reach out. I would be glad to help you even if you just need a hype man.

[letstalkaboutfics]

Where I Sleep

FANDOM: Grey's Anatomy

PAIRING: One Sided Mark Sloan/Addison Montgomery

RATING: K

Standalone Song-Fic to 'Where I Sleep' by Emeli Sande, from the 2012 album 'Our Version of Events' in which we learn more about Mark's thought processes with regards to following Addison to Seattle.

There's nowhere that I wouldn't follow

There's nothing that I won't do for your kiss

Mark had known that it would only be a matter of days before Addie left him. He knew he had messed up. He hadn't been able to help himself from the moment that Addie had said she wasn't going to keep the baby, their baby. He knew he should have stayed faithful, proven to her that he would be a good father, but he also knew that that wouldn't have saved their relationship when all Addison wanted to do was go to find her husband, no matter how badly Mark wanted her to stay with him.

So, in reality, he shouldn't have been surprised when she left him a note telling him that she was going to be going to find her husband, his best friend and that he shouldn't follow her. However, despite his infidelity, he truly believed that he and Addison were meant to be together and for that reason, he chose to ignore her wishes. He was going after. He loved her. He had loved her for longer than he should have, given that she was his best friend's wife, but he no longer wanted to hide the fact he loved her.

I love you like there's no tomorrow

Cause nothing ever felt like this

Almost immediately, Mark hit his first issue. He had no idea where to find them. Addie had done well to cover her tracks, she must have known that Mark would follow her immediately, if given the chance, so she simply hadn't told anyone where she was going, except their boss. However, Mark wouldn't give up that easily. He couldn't, not if he wanted to win Addison back.

So he kept calling people, asking after not only Addison but Derek as well, figuring if he found one of them, he would find both of them. He wanted Derek back in his life as well, they had been best friends, brothers even, for so long, so to go this long without talking to him was torture for Mark. He knew he deserved Derek's hatred but that didn't make it any easier on him.

There's nothing I won't steal or borrow

I'll travel on a boat or aeroplane

It took him three long weeks to finally find them, through whisperings of a dirty mistress in Seattle, at Seattle Grace Hospital. This, he decided, must be the same Dirty Mistress that he and Addie had heard about while they were together, Derek's new woman. So he made an excuse to be there, finding a patient in Seattle who could have been treated by any doctor, and deciding that they needed the full Mark Sloan treatment.

The next step had been to call Richard Webber, and book himself a flight to Seattle. He had prepared a whole speech about why Doctor Webber needed him there for this surgery, but the man had practically jumped at the chance, offering him full surgical privileges for the duration of his trip, which would take place just ten days later, giving him time to make arrangements for his own practice while he was gone, including rearranging certain surgeries so that he could be out of town for as long as he needed.

I'll explore a world of sorrow

Cause when I find you I know, I know I'ma be okay

Mark didn't think he'd ever actually experienced heartbreak before unless you counted the death of his grandmother, but that was a very different type of heartbreak. That heartbreak had been unavoidable. He could have stopped Addison leaving. He could have remained loyal to her to convince her that he was worthy of being with her, that he was better than Derek and he had betrayed her instead and it broke his heart, and possibly hers, although he didn't think she had ever truly loved him the way that he loved her.

He knew he had to get her back, Derek would never truly forgive her for the betrayal that had happened, even if his absence had been the primary cause of it. Derek had been absent for the better part of two years and it meant that Mark had spent more time with Addie than Derek had, keeping her company on birthdays, anniversaries, and Christmases, had it been any shock that they had fallen into each other's beds? Honestly, no. Addie made everything better, she made him not want to be a manwhore anymore.

See the times are changing

And I'm sure of nothing that I know

Except this is us, and this is love, and this is where I'm home

Arriving in Seattle, Mark felt as though he was home. Mark, 'lives breathes, and eats New York City', Sloan, felt home. It wasn't because he'd been there before, although he had on several occasions. It was because he knew he was closer to Addie, to the woman that he loved and he would not be leaving again without her. He couldn't lose her again, even if she was no longer having their baby.

Yes, the idea of starting a family together had frightened Mark, but he had grown used to it, started looking forward to being a father, and then she had told him that she didn't want to have a baby with him, that the only baby she wanted to have was Derek's and it had broken him. That was why he had slept with someone else, but in his eyes, it didn't mean that he loved her any less. He loved her with his whole heart if this was what love was. He still wasn't entirely sure, but he had never felt this way before.

In a world that's breaking, where nothing is for keeps

Oh this is us, this is love and this is where I sleep

This is us, this is love and this is where I sleep

Marks world was broken, it had been since the start of his affair with Addison. He had been broken since the moment he decided to break Derek's trust and sleep with his wife. It had gotten more broken the minute that Derek had found out and then it had shattered when Derek had told his family what had happened. Mark had gone from a large family who cared about him, to only Addison in under a day and it had truly broken him.

And then, as if nothing could get any worse, Addison left. Addison left to chase after the husband who had started an affair in Seattle. After the husband who had been so cruel to her over the last few years. After a man who wasn't him. Mark couldn't let that go, he needed her, because without her he was all alone. He didn't want to be alone anymore. He couldn't do it.

I'm from a generation undecided

I'm restless and I can't help changing lanes

Looking around Seattle-Tacoma 'SeaTac' Airport, Mark debated with just going back to New York. Addie had already had weeks to return to him and she hadn't yet, so did he really stand a chance? There was a chance that when he arrived at the hospital, he would find Derek and Addison back together, stronger than ever, and he wasn't sure that his heart could take that.

Still, he moved through the airport towards the taxi rank, ordering a car to the hotel he had booked, the Archfield, which was apparently the nicest hotel close to Seattle Grace. He debated with finding a bar, having a drink and just treating this as a work trip like he used to, finding a pretty girl to spend the night with. Just ignoring the fact that he came here for Addison, ignoring the Shepherds completely, and pretending that he didn't know they were there before he booked his trip.

But in all the noise and the excitement

Your love is all that will remain

Then he took a look at his phone, at the photos of him and Addie together and how happy they looked. He couldn't be there and not say anything to here. If there was a chance that his feelings were returned, that she had even the slightest bit of love for him, then he couldn't leave her there. He would prove it to her this time, prove that he could be loyal. He wanted to be with her, no matter how much it hurt Derek.

I've said all of my goodbyes to ego

I gambled all I got, there's no plan B

It was true, Mark had no contingency plan. No idea what he'd do if Addison said she wouldn't come back to New York with him. Would he be willing to give up his home for her, to stay in Seattle to pick up the pieces when Derek inevitably broke her heart? Honestly, for her? He thought that he could. He would be the bigger person to show her that he loved her.

He settled himself in the bed at the Archfield, deciding against going to the bar, against pulling some random girl to make him feel better about himself before he saw Addison in the morning, before he saw the man who once considered him a brother, before he made a move that would change his whole life. He let himself fall asleep, although he slept fitfully, anxious for the morning.

It's the first time that I've learnt to let go

It's the only place I feel, only place I feel like me

The next morning, Mark made sure that he was dressed so that he looked his best. His clothing wasn't intended to make him look smart, he didn't need that, credentials speaking for him, but instead to look ruggedly handsome, to remind Addie of what she was missing. He got into a cab to Seattle Grace and moved through the lobby, spotting Addison and Derek and noticing Dereks eyes on a blonde girl who must have been an intern. His dirty mistress? Possibly.

He made his way over to her, peeping over her shoulder at the file before clearing his throat and muttering, "Invasive non-small-cell with a history of COPD. That's pretty much a goner, right?" with his signature smirk. This was going to be fun.

See the times are changing

I'm sure of nothing that I know

Except this is us and this is love, and this is where I'm home

In a world that's breaking, where nothing is for keeps

Oh this is us, this is love and this is where I sleep

This is us, this is love and this is where I sleep